What Are We Now?
by emisonAsPhuck
Summary: Set 2 years after the A reveal. The girls have headed their separate ways to college but decided after two years they are taking a year out of studying to reconnect, all living together in a beach house in California! EMISON, Aria Spencer and Hannah all in story. Opening written in Emily's point of view changes into 3rd person as story progresses. rated M for future story.
1. Introduction

Emily's POV

Just two short years ago my life was a mess. Caught up in the whole A-ness of it all, emotionally abused a victim of a faceless tormentor, finally unmAsked to us as none other than Cece Drake. During what I like to call the A period of life, I always wondered what it would feel like to finally find out who this person was and why so badly they wanted to hurt us and make our lives miserable. I thought I would feel safe, happy in the knowing, I thought I would feel relief but I didn't, Im still waiting to feel that. After hearing Cece's story I felt a huge amount of sadness, not for myself but for her. Have you ever heard anything so stupid I think to myself?! She crashed into my house, she locked me in a box to be sawn in half, she threatened my parents, my girlfriend, my safety, my Ali.. and I still felt sadness towards her, what an awful life she has lead, rejection at every turning and all she really wanted was a family and someone to love. Somehow she got caught up in this game that consumed her, consumed all of us and without it I wasn't really sure who I was. Not realising I don't have to be scared at every noise in the dark, every time my phone buzzes it isn't going to be an anonymous text threatening to expose my deepest darkest secrets, I didn't have to assume everyone I meet was working in the A team, not everyone is out for playing a game with me as the doll and I just didn't know what to do. Before I knew it i was in UCLA studying sports therapy and leading a 'normal' life, the girls weren't beside me, I couldn't SOS them whenever I needed them, the different time zones meant that I couldn't even ring them when I needed to talk and I felt so alone, finding myself longing to go back to my life a few years ago. Of course like any girl running away from her problems at college I turned to partying. I was never really one for that, I have had issues in the past where drowning my sorrows felt like a good idea but this was different, I was out every night, with new "friends" in a new bar and usually going home with a new girl. Waking up the next morning not remembering a thing with a headache to let me know I didn't want to remember. When I did talk to the girls they seemed to have moved on and were happy, Aria following her photography dreams, Spenc being some big hot shot in politics, I don't know much about that world it bores me and I get confused, I usually just agree with whatever spencer tells me, and Hannah of course working her way up in the fashion world and actually excelling in her classes at FIDM! Hannah excelling in class, now that is definitely not something I saw coming ha! As for Ali it's been almost two years since we last spoke, Hannah told me she is doing really well back in Rosewood, building up her family with Cece and working on singing, when we were younger Ali and I always spoke about her making it as a singer, talk about her dreams of making the big time, touring the world and bringing me with her, her biggest fan and groupie. Ali's voice was sensational even if it was my biased opinion so I wasn't surprised to hear she was recording music, of course she hasn't hit the big time yet but give it a few years and im almost certain that she will.

Things with me and Ali were strained and I left thinking the less I spoke to her the better I would feel, at first I was right I didn't think about her at all I threw myself into college and 'extra-curricular' activities and I forgot all about my home, and the girl who I had loved so deeply for as long as I can remember. After a while this wasn't enough, I was surrounded by so many people but I never felt so alone, these people that became my friends weren't really that. They didn't know me, my struggles, hopes and dreams and my fears. They liked me because I was a party animal and hosted the meanest parties but when the alcohol stopped flowing they stopped coming. I became retracted from society, I went to college got on with my work came home and watched TV alone, I was barely talking to Hannah, Aria and Spencer but I think they knew something was up, they staged a friend intervention to pull me out of my depression and here we are. All taking a year out to reconnect, spend time together, be friends, laugh and make memories, the memories we should have had from our teenage years. With the persuasion of Spencer, I never could fight her once she made her mind up about something, we are moving into a beach house together right here in California. All five of us. Apparently Hannah told Aria it would be good to ask Ali to join us, she had spent the rest of her adolescent years looking after Cece and hadn't really had any time with new friends or relationships, so the girls tell me although I am convinced she must be with someone, how can she not no one in her right mind would let her me alone (apart from me). She thought it would be nice to get to know Ali, the Ali that we all wanted her to be.

I have no idea why Hannah thought that would be a good idea! I love her but I could also kill her sometimes. I have been running from my feelings for Ali for the past two years, filling my time and thoughts with anything but her and Hannah's intervention plan was to bring her to live in the same house as me for a whole year. Im screwed!


	2. Reunited

**A.N**

 **So I've been trying to write this story for a while, it's the first one I've ever rewritten so some feedback would be nice, first few chapters are just building up my story to where I want it to go so I hope you stick with it.**

3rd person.

Emily was packing up the last of her things to take to the new house when her phone rang. She picked up to see Hannah's name flash on the screen "Emily, are you ready for me? I've landed im going to be at the house in an hour, you better be there waiting. I've a millions bags, I hate flying and im jet lagged so im grouchy but you better get over it because im so excited to see you, are you still as sexy as when you left?" Emily chuckled as she heard her blonde friend on the other end rambling with excitement barely taking a breath. "Hannah breathe, im just finishing up my packing now I won't be too much longer but spenc is already there, she's signing for the house, apparently she doesn't trust any of us!" "she will never change will she Em, please don't be too long we've got so much to do, plus we want to pick the best rooms before Aria and Ali get there, Im a Queen and I need a Queen bedroom" Emily laughed and felt real happiness for the first time in a long time. "Okay Han see you soon love you" "love you" and with that she put the phone down. Emily sat for a minuet amongst the mess of her packing and just thought, thought of seeing her friends after so long, of being surrounded by them for a whole year, no more loneliness, and all of a sudden a twinge came deep down in the pit of her stomach as the thought of Alison washed over her. Her an Ali would always been a touchy subject, after Cece was revealed Emily was Ali's support system and they grew close, Emily felt like things were moving in the right direction spending almost every day and night together, she lived at Ali's for basically the whole summer and was almost certain Alison was finally going to admit her feelings but with the click of her fingers the walls came back up. Emily was strong now, she wasn't like the young girl Ali manipulated she didn't want to let Ali tell her it was all in her head, that she didn't feel the same way and she wanted to scream and shake her to let her know it wasn't a weakness to love someone but an incredible strength, they argued and argued until they just never spoke.

When Alison and Emily were younger, they had many things that were just between them, secret phone calls, sleepovers, text messages and Emily always thought it was just Alison's way of trying to make her feel special so she would always be loyal but this particular memory Emily knew deep down was real. They used to send songs to each other, of course music was Ali's thing and every time a new song came out Emily would send it over to Alison, Alison replying with a different song she liked. Emily did this because she felt the truth in the lyrics and was almost all of the time a love song. Alison would reply with the latest chart topping hit so Emily gathered that she never caught on to the reason she was sending them but every so often she'd drop in a love song herself. It was the only way that Alison could tell Emily how she felt she would imagine singing the song to her and although Emily had hoped that was the reason, she never pushed it.

Once Emily and Alison had been fighting over everything and anything and sometimes even nothing, Emily had no energy left. The day she was due to leave to California, she knocked at Alison's to say goodbye and when she found no one was home she just left a box with a note that read

 **Ali,**

 **I listen to this and think of us,**

 **I know it aint easy...**

 **Love Em x**

And inside the simple box was just one CD, Emily liked old school, it was more personal than an iTunes download. The CD was one and only by Adele and Emily thought that every single lyric was just exactly what she needed to say and she left.

When she got to California she checked her phone constantly wishing Alison's name would just flash up and everything would already been explained in the song, but nothing came. Weeks and weeks she waited until she started thinking, what if Alison never got the box? That Pepe could have ripped it up, someone could have taken it from the porch or maybe she really didn't care, and weeks turned into months and the CD was just a distant memory.

Emily shook her head as she stood up in her room grabbing the last of her bags and heading to the car. Feeling so excited to see the girls she hopped in the car and made her way to their new luxurious abode for the next year of course funded by non-other than Anne Wintour wanna be and the next Hillary Clinton, Hanna and Spencer. The day was hot, just the beginning of summer so it wasn't quite unbearable yet and the sun felt nice on Emily's face, opening the windows to let the wind blow through and of course turning up the radio full volume because what is a road trip without having a mini concert in your car. After a few miles Emily felt content knowing that things could only get better for her, only now realising the depressive state she had got herself into. She heard a voice on the radio and recognised it instantly "yes finally Adele's new song, she took long enough" Emily shouted and turned the radio higher, Emily is a hopeless romantic and it seems Adele is too so she loves her. As the music played Emily just listening to the lyrics _**hello it's me, I was wondering if after all this time you'd like to meet to go over, everything. They say that times supposed to heal ya but I aint done much healing. Hello, can you hear me, im in California dreaming about who we use to be when we were younger and free…**_ a tear had escaped her eye and was rolling softly onto her cheek. Emily had forgot all about the CD she sent to Ali and this song has just reminded her. Wondering if she would get the chance to ever send another one to her, because it would definitely be this one, Emily connected to the song straight away and sub sequentially connected to Ali as well. She drove the rest of the journey just listening to the song and thinking of the lyrics over and over.

As Emily pulled up on the drive she seen Hannah and Spencer's cars and squealed, barely giving her own car enough time to turn off before she jumped out and ran straight in the house searching for her friends. As she got to the living room, Hannah and spencer already bickering over who sits where and boundaries, for a year in a fun house spencer certainly has a lot of rules.

"Can you two stop arguing for 2 minutes and come over her to your wonderful friend who you haven't seen in 2 years" Emily said as she flung her bag on the floor. "Arrrghhh Em!" Hannah and Spencer ran over to Emily and squeezed her so tight she thought her head could pop off at any minute. "Safe to say you've missed me then". "Emily you don't understand, I've missed you so much, you're the cheese to my pizza and I cannot believe I've had to have cheese free pizza for 2 years" Hannah said with pure excitement. Emily and spencer just laughed knowing that and wondering how Hannah is doing so well when that girl doesn't half come out with some stupid things. "Han why have you been ordering cheese less pizza that's just wrong, if you need help ordering next time ask me" Emily chuckled and was so happy she was back, winding her best friend up. "Shut up you goofball you know what I meant". "Anyway now that we've got the Hannah-ness of this conversation out of the way, hello Emily how are you? You look fantastic by the way, I can wait for you to show us around where you have been living for the past two years" Spencer said excitedly thinking of what their year had in store. Before the girls could carry on their conversation they heard the door swing open. "Fucking hell Hanna how well are you actually doing this house is incredible" in walks the short brunette who in ratio to her height should not be able to carry the amount of bags she currently is. "Oh aria, this is all Hasting's honey, I can push for a few bills though" Hanna laughed as she pulled her friend into a tight hug and signalled the other 2 girls to come and join for a group hug. "I can't believe it, we have been apart for so long and this now makes me feel like we were just having sleepovers in Spencer's barn yesterday, you don't know how much I have missed you guys" Emily said tears forming in her eyes, mainly because she was so happy but also but she is realising just now how sad she has actually felt. The other three girls looked at each other knowing exactly how their friend felt, silently smiling as they knew this was absolutely the right thing to do to get their Emily back.


	3. Emily

**A.N I can't believe how many views I have had already, I am enjoying writing this so hopefully chapters will keep coming, don't worry this is an Emison story we are just building up to it** **please keep leaving reviews.**

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The girls spent the rest of the night talking, laughing, and crying. Thinking back with fondness and twinges of sadness on the past, recalling the not so distant memory of A but when the girls looked in each other's eyes they knew that without A, Cece or charlotte whatever she was calling herself, they would not be here, not this location per say but with each other. No doubt about it their friendship grew more intense and important than most people ever do because of "A" and they were so glad of it, the girls were more like sisters than best friends and knew that no matter what life throws at them they will always have each other. As darkness started to fall Emily could not stop looking at the door, she had expected Alison to be here by now. Mentally she was not really in the conversation with the others rather preparing what she was going to do, say, feel. "I..." Emily interrupted the conversation and the three girls looked at her waiting to finish. "Im just going to go the bathroom" Emily said quickly as she stood up and left the room. What she really wanted to ask was why Ali wasn't there yet but she couldn't bring herself to say it because that led to more questions about the girl that she wasn't sure she wanted answers to.

Hanna starts "okay im just going to say it, Emily's on another planet, she's said two words all night and is continually looking at the door, if she ponders on her thoughts of Alison any longer her head is going to explode". "Hanna you're forgetting that the girl who she has been in love with forever is due to walk through the door any minuet and she hasn't seen her for two years" Spencer adds. "No Spencer I hadn't forgot that at all, it was my idea to invite Alison in the first place in case you forgot?! All im saying is she hasn't seen me for two years either and I didn't even get half that emotion from her, if only it was my pants she wanted to get into" Hanna giggled. Aria just rolled her eyes at the girls and stood up to look at the window as she was sure she saw a car light. "erm girls if you want to stop whatever shit you're talking about over there and come here, Ali has just pulled up. "Ooh great maybe she'll show me some enthusiasm" Hanna shouted as she ran off to the door, spencer and aria following behind rolling their eyes. "Do my eyes deceive me or is _the_ Alison DiLaurentis actually wearing sweats!" "Shut up Han, what do you want me to do drive 6 hours in Valentino? I think not now stop inspecting me and let me in the bloody house, actually I'll rephrase that, OUR bloody house" eeek the girls squeal and helped Ali with her bags, which by the way there were millions, of course nothing less was to be expect of Alison. Once inside Hanna gave the tour, spencer shouting over every now and then her rules "We get it Spencer organised, rule permitting fun, we can't wait" Alison giggled as Hannah said under her breath "like she thinks rules are going to work with 5 girls, 2 who wanna bone each other and the rest of us who just wanna have sick parties and remember, no job, no school, no responsibilities. IT'S GUNA BE SICK BITCHES" Hanna decided to scream the last part and the other girls cheered with excitement which didn't give Alison a chance to ask about the 2 girls boning comment. Mental note that one for later Alison thought and she followed everyone into the living room.

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Emily splashed water on her face as she looked at the reflection staring back at her in the mirror, she didn't quite recognise herself, as she stood there she thought how sad and fragile she looked. Like almost broken. "Pull yourself together Em" she said to herself as she turned and left the bathroom. However as she got to the door she stood dead in her tracks as making its way up the stairs was the sound of her voice, her laugh and in that moment she felt a million different emotions that she didn't even think was possible. Her stomach was doing backflips, she felt sick and excited and didn't know what to do, her chest felt like it was collapsing on its self and she was struggling to breathe, the walls were caving in on her and she was sure her heart was beating at a hundred beats a minute, Emily had started experiencing panic attacks about a year ago and hadn't told anyone about it as she felt so weak and ashamed, her depression was much more serious than she ever liked to even admit herself and she didn't want to burden anyone with the worry plus she thought if she even began to explain how she was feeling anyone would think she was insane and she didn't want her friends to think of her differently. Her eyes started to well up and she shuck her thoughts far from her mind but how could she face Ali, how could she walk down those stairs and look her in the eye and pretend that she's happy. Without a second thought Emily grabbed her phone out of her pocket.

 **To Becca:**

 **Hey fancy going out tonight, I need to blow off some steam ;)**

 **From Becca:**

 **Sure thing hot stuff ;) im out and about meet you at modo in 15 x**

Emily knew where the night was heading, Becca was one of her random hook-ups and she was always up for a good time but she would deal with the consequences in the morning. She ran into her room rooted for a dress in her still packed bags, threw it on and left. Once down the stairs she passed the living room and saw the blonde she was trying to avoid had her back to the door and Emily thanked her lucky stars that she wouldn't have to deal with eye contact until the morning.

"Em what are you doing", shouted Aria as she got up to see Emily. "Hot date, can't stop don't wait up, bye" Emily shouted as she grabbed her keys and headed out

the door.

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"Emily's gone out, hot date apparently, she didn't say anything about that earlier" Aria said sadness evident in her voice as she knew the real reason her friend had left so quickly, all stemming from the hurt she had felt about Alison. The girls knew that Emily was having a hard time over the last few years and thought that they could fix it even though they were now all back together Emily wasn't really with them, she was somewhere else completely.

Alison swore that she felt her heart smash into a million little pieces when she heard Emily mention her hot date. Of course what was Alison expecting it had been two years since they had last seen each other, did she really think that Emily would be still pining over her, she expected Emily had started a relationship by now but didn't realise how much it would hurt to hear it with her own ears. Alison thought she didn't really have a right to be hurt, after all it was her who pushed Emily away, being too stupid and too scared to admit that she loved Emily in so many more ways than being best friends. During their last summer together her and Emily had shared a few kisses and lots of cuddles but she had never actually said the words that Emily wanted and needed to hear but the kisses weren't what scared her, what scared her the most was something much more deep, it was their connection, how she felt that with Emily she could conquer the world and without her she might just die, she has never felt that way about anyone and it scared her to death how one person could hold her heart with the ability to kill it whenever they wanted. "Earth to Alison". "uh sorry, what did you say Han?" "Jeez what does it take for people to give me attention around here, I said what the hell are we going to do with Emily, clearly she's much more broken that we thought" Alison just remained silent, _broken?_ was it really her fault Emily was like this, of course all of the girls had been through a lot and Emily leading up to the reveal of Charlotte had been the strongest, she was the rock for all of her friends when they seemed to be falling apart but now, what had happened to her? 'If only I had told her, if only I contacted her, maybe she would be okay or maybe she wouldn't but I will never know'.


	4. Alison

**A.N. absolutely buzzing with this story, considering its the first i have ever written, i know its going pretty slow, but i just wanted to set the scene, hopefully im going to be moving it on quicker and getting to the good stuff EMISON, please continue leaving reviews.. just a question how many words preferable to be in each chapter as ive tried to split it up to make for easier reading but struggling a little, also let me know where you'd like ali and Emily to go, anything specific to write in the story :) thanks**

The girls talked for hours more about how they were going to help Emily, they planned how they were going to spend their first proper day in the house and decided it was time to turn in for bed. After a short argument (mainly from Hanna) about who was in what room, the girls all heading for bed, of course Hanna and Alison had got the biggest rooms, Aria and Spencer just gave in deciding it wasn't worth the fight with the two blondes that they would eventually lose anyway.

Alison lay in bed in complete darkness, wide awake although she felt exhausted. Tossing and turning her mind filled with Emily she looked at the clock to see it was 05.05am dawn was almost drawing in and the thought of sleep was pointless now so she headed down stairs and sat at the breakfast bar in the kitchen staring into her cup of coffee. She wasn't sure how long she had been sat there when she heard a noise coming from the front door, although she knew it had been a while since her coffee was now completely cold.

"Fuck" she heard and as she turned her head she thought she was going to die right there and then as she locked eyes with a slightly drunk but insanely beautiful Emily. She was wearing an incredibly tight fitting white dress, highlighting her tanned skin and athletic body, Alison almost forgot to breathe as her eyes scanned over Emily's curvy bottom and cleavage _. 'Eyes back in your head'_ Alison thought and she stuttered, "Uh h-hi Em, what time is it". Emily stood for while just staring, not particularly at Alison's face but more her body and as Ali looked down she realised why, she was wearing Emily's rosewood sharks t-shirt that Emily had left at her house that summer, she wore it most nights for bed it was baggy on her small frame and it made her feel safe, at first she wore it because it smelt like Emily but the smell had long gone now and it was more habit, she felt close to the swimmer and wore it almost subconsciously now, she hadn't even thought about what it would look like when Emily saw she wore it. _'God Ali smooth move, now you look like a desperate idiot trying to make a statement_ '. Emily shook her head, "its 6, goodnight Alison" and she walked swiftly up the stairs to her room. As her door shut she fell down on the other side, curling into her knees, tears filling her eyes _. 'Hi Em, oh so casually as if she hadn't broke my heart into a million pieces and not spoke me for 2 years seriously! Why, why, why did she have to be sat there and why is she wearing my shirt?! Is she playing another game waiting up for me, she looked hot though, her body is smoking and those eyes, those beautiful blue eyes! Just kill me now how am I going to survive this year?'_ She shook her head, stood up and collapsed on her bed as the room started spinning into a blur until eventually she fell into a deep sleep.

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"Good morning beautiful" she tried to prise her eyes open the light almost too much to bare and she saw her blonde best friend standing in front of her looking almost too happy for it to be morning. "Jeeze Hanna not so loud and when did you become such a morning person?!" she winced turning over in bed and closing her eyes once more. Hanna jumped on the bed, shaking Emily

"Em its 1pm, not all of us were dirty stop outs last night, what the hell happened our first night together and you bailed"

"Hanna if you move once more on this bed I swear I will throw up on you, I just needed to get out it had been a long day with moving and I hadn't seen my friends in a while"

"Oh so it totally had nothing to do with the fact Alison walked through the door 5 seconds before you left, and friends? They more like drinking and fuck buddies, we are your friends and we haven't see you for two years, if that's how you want it to be then fine" Hanna said angrily and she stood up and walked out of the room.

"Han wait, I didn't mean it like that" Emily sat up a little too fast and she saw double vision Hanna walking out of her door

"Save it" she heard coming from the hall.

' _Emily why can't you just keep you're big mouth shut'_ Emily was hurting and hung over, she didn't want to deal with what was waiting for her just outside that door, specifically in the room just to the left of her and although she knew pushing her friends away wasn't the answer it was much easier to do than deal with facing her broken heart…. And mind!

"Just go back and try again Han, hung over Emily is hard to deal with at the best of times, never mind hung over Emily running from her problems" Spencer and Aria lectured Hanna on being so harsh with Emily and Alison heard the last of their conversation, was Emily really as broken as they were all saying and why had no one told her, why hadn't she told her? Her mind drifted to when she found the box lying on her porch, it was the end of summer and she had been arguing with Emily for weeks both of them dancing around the fact that Emily knew Ali was in love with her but she just couldn't say the words and in true Ali fashion she lied and pushed her away, she had just been on a run with pepe, actually no Ali wasn't one for running she would go on long long walks with her headphones escaping the world and her thoughts, music was the only thing she had for escape, songs understood her more than anyone did, well anyone apart from Emily. She walked up to her porch to find a small neatly wrapped box with a tag on it, ' **I know it aint easy… love Em"** she remembers like it was yesterday picking it up thinking what the hell Emily was going on about and what she had left her. She opened the box to find one CD in it, quickly running upstairs and rummaging through her wardrobe until she found a CD player in the back, smiling at the fact that her old soul Emily would be the only person to still listen to CDs. Pressing play the music started, **"you've been on my mind.."** and Ali got lost in the lyrics instantly **"I dare you to let me be your one and only, I promise im worthy…"** a single tear rolled down Ali's cheek as she listened to the song that she swore could have been written by Emily herself the words were so true, as she got to the end she heard it **"I know it aint easy, giving up your heart"** and burst in to tears until she was sobbing, feeling her heart swell at the thought of Emily listening to this song and meaning every word to Ali, she wondered how someone could know her so well and still love her as much as she did.

It had been hours now since Alison sat in her room with the song on repeat, she had written many messages out to Emily and even went to ring her a few times but every time she did, she'd put her phone down and cry more at the fact that she just couldn't do it. She knew she loved Emily more than she has ever loved anyone before but she just couldn't say the words, she felt too vulnerable and it hurt, as the days went on Ali was consumed with all things Emily but still couldn't bring herself to make the call, she just figured by now it was too late that Emily had moved on with her life in California and would have met a new girl who was happy to love her the way she needed, the way she deserved. Before she knew it weeks turned into months and months into years and she guess that her and Emily would have been the one that never was, all until she set her eyes on her last night in the middle of the house that they now shared for a whole year.


	5. Honesty and Truth of Love and Hurt

**A.N. soo this is a pretty long chapter, i just didn't know where to split it. i have tried my best to explain in this how Emily is feeling.. Really loving writing this story, amazed at how many views i am getting! please keep reviewing and also let me know what songs remind you of ali and Emily, as im kinda focusing on songs:) thanks again**

As Alison walked into the living room, she was greeted by Hanna, Spencer and Aria all grinning at her and she knew that look all too well, they were up to something and she was just about to get dragged in to it. "What the hell are you up to, and what exactly are you planning for me to do" Alison asked with suspicion lacing her tone. "I don't even know what you mean" smirked Hanna, "Come on, I have known you all since we were 13, I think I know what a bad idea looks like by now" Alison laughed, not fully as she had a feeling she wasn't going to like what she had to say. "Well…" starts Aria before Hanna butts in "okay you got us we were thinking, Emily…" Alison felt butterflies in the pit of her stomach just at her name and was certain it was written all over her face as well. "I think we all can see she isn't the Emily that we left 2 years ago, we all had it bad, I mean come on we were tortured by that bitch for years, no offence Ali" Hanna said almost forgetting that Cece was Alison's sister. "None taken Han", "well yeah as I was saying, we all had it bad but Emily never seemed fazed at the time, she was the strongest one, Mona had her wrong from the start, she was never the weakest link, she fought for all of us, mainly you Ali and I think we need to fight for her now, I don't know what's happened with her but I don't like it and I want my Em back" Hanna saying these words like her life depended on it. _'I think you'll find Hanna that she's_ _ **my**_ _Em'_ Alison thought to herself, but instead saying "and where exactly do I come into this".

"Isn't it obvious Alison, she's hurt because she loved you, loves you. She always has and I think she always will. She needs help being put back together by someone who loves her just as deeply" Spencer says airing caution on her last words because although the girls know that Alison loves her back in the same way no one has actually said it out loud yet.

"I-I…" Alison goes to deny it but as she did her heart felt heavy, she's had enough of running from her feelings, she's no longer the teen Queen worrying what people will think of her if she loves another girl, she is a grown woman and finally just wants to love who she loves.

"H-how, I mean how do you know, I haven't spoken to Emily In 2 years, I haven't even seen her, in fact the first time I did was last night at 6 am on her way in from her HOT date, she doesn't love me anymore" Alison said with only sadness in her voice.

Aria decided it was her time to cut in as she had a way of saying things with more thought that what Hanna and Spencer did. "Ali, we have known that you love Emily long before you probably realised yourself, no-one looks at their friend the way you look at her" "yeah I was kind of jealous, I mean Im kinda sad im not gay Emily is hot as fuck" Hanna butted in and Spencer and Aria just shot her a look as if to say really Hanna, not the time, Alison just blushed.

"ANYWAY, as I was saying before I was interrupted by the moron over here, you and Emily have always had something that ran much deeper than just friends, I know you have been scared to admit it for you own sake Ali, but I think it's time you speak to Emily for her sake. She still loves you, when we have spoken on the phone I can almost hear her heart beat when you're name is mentioned, and im pretty sure she's the person who's downloaded every copy of your single on iTunes" "not that we're saying it's not good enough for anyone else to download, I totally have" Hanna adds. Aria again glaring at Hanna.

"Hanna seriously, enough with the comments, I thought you would have learned to not put your foot in it by now. Ali im not saying run in her room and say I love you Emily, happily ever after your fixed, because it's going to be a long road for you pair, but you need to make the first move. I don't think you realise, actually I don't think we all realised how sad and broken Emily really is and she needs you, her hot date was nothing more than her running away from her problems, her running away from you!" Aria finished.

Alison smiled, she felt so happy to be here with her friends right now as they spoke to her so open and truthful actually trusting her with their friend's heart, after everything they have been through, Alison doesn't even deserve friends, never mind some as amazing as these girls are.

"I don't even deserve to be loved by her or any of you, I was so awful to you, to her, I watched her walk out of my life and I just let her".

"Alison we have all done things that we regret, I mean I kissed my sister's boyfriend, well boyfriendS! I accused my own boyfriend of being A, I was addicted to freakin' drugs" says Spencer

"Yeah I tried to run you out of town, i kind of became an alcoholic, and I got you arrested for murder, when Mona wasn't even dead" Hanna adds

"Well I urm slept with my teacher, who turned out to be a stalker writing a book about my best friends erm shall we say disappearance and I still fell back in love with him" Aria laughs

"The point is Ali, we have all done things that make us bad people, but we all deserve to be loved and have a second chance, and if you chose not to be loved by Emily I think it will be the worst mistake of your life" Spencer says firmly.

"And plus I've heard she's pretty good in bed, I bet she gives the best..."

"HAN enough I get it i get it" Alison says as she blushes, thinking about anything to do with naked Emily makes her feel hot under the collar. "I get it, I'll speak to her, and I think I know what I've got to do"

As Alison turned round to walk up the stairs, the other girls smile at each other feeling pleased that they have actually accomplished something, and kind of smug at the fact they just told Alison the cold hard truth and they are still alive to speak of it. "She really has changed" Spencer whispers. Alison is now stood in front of Emily's door, her heart is racing and feels like she's actually going to throw up. Standing there for a few moments contemplating what her next move is going to be she starts to turn around when she hears some quiet sobs through the door and reminds herself she is not doing this for her feelings, but for Emily. She gives a light knock on the door and walks in, as she enters the dimly lit room she can see a curled up lump on the bed that has now just realised someone is standing by her. Alison starts lightly "Em…" Emily quickly jumps round to now face Alison, her eyes are red and her face is puffy, Alison thinks she can see a glimmer in Emily's eyes but it quickly changes to almost nothing-ness. "Alison, I don't know why you're here and I don't care but I can't do this, just leave" Emily says with anger in her voice. "Em, please i…" Emily quickly interrupts. "Do not Em me, my name is Emily, you lost the right to call me anything other when you chewed up my feelings and spat me out like I was nothing to you, I don't want to hear anything you have to say to me, I get it I was foolish enough once to think that you could ever love me like that, like anything actually I won't make that mistake again, now if you don't mind I need to shower" Emily stood up from her bed and walked into the bathroom, Alison could feel the tears building up in her eyes, she felt her heart shatter in her chest and wanted nothing more than to run to Emily shake her and tell her how much she loves her, but right now that would do no good, she walked out of Emily's room and straight into her own. To the girls that were stood at the end of the hall trying to overhear their conversation it looked like Alison had already given up but that wasn't the case, she was going to make Emily smile again, if it was the last thing she did.

Emily stood in the shower feeling the hot water cover her body, she had to hold onto the wall as she was sure her legs wouldn't hold her. Loud cries escaped her mouth no matter how much she tried to cover it up. If she hadn't felt bad already after speaking to Alison she felt a million times worse, _who did she think she is walking in like she could Em me and everything would be fine, maybe she does see me as the crazily in love girl who would do anything at her request._ Emily thought to herself and her sadness had now turned to anger. As she pondered on her thoughts for a little longer she faintly heard a song coming from the room to the left of her and she felt sick to her stomach when she realised exactly what it was. **"Lose yourself in time, at the mention of name, will I ever know how it feels to hold you close, and have you tell me 'which ever road you choose I'll go" '** _She cannot be fucking serious, classic Alison playing the song that meant so much to me, the song that I sent to her, the one she didn't even acknowledge, the one that she let me leave and walk away, she's twisted actually twisted'_ Emily thought as she got out the shower getting herself ready for a screaming match with Alison, she was not going to let Ali get away with taunting her like that.

The song had finished by the time Emily was walking out of her room and she noticed Ali's door was open she peered inside to see no one was there and stormed downstairs. "Where the fuck is Ali" Emily screamed to the other girls who were sat round the kitchen island eating lunch. "Em calm down, what's wrong, what happened, Ali's gone out she's had to go to a meeting with her label and she'll be back later" Aria said as she swallowed her food, "I'm going to kill the bitch, why didn't she stay dead in the first place and everything would be okay, I hate her, how dare she try to talk to me after all this time, how dare she play that song in our house, how dare she even be here"Emily now properly crying as she spoke the last words. Her friends felt their hearts hurt so much as stood in front of them was their broken friend and they didn't know how to help her any more.

"Emily what are you talking about, what song? Ali is trying to be your friend, we all are please don't push us away, we love you and we just want you to be okay" Hanna said as she got up to hug her friend. "Don't, don't do that don't stick up for her, don't choose her over me" Emily said pulling away from Hanna's grip and tried to walk off. "EMILY FUCKING FIELDS, don't you dare, you are my best friend in the whole world, I would never choose anyone over you, I am here for you, we are all here for you and like it or not we are staying until you tell us and truly tell us what you need. Go ahead, walk out go and get wasted with another whore tonight, I couldn't care less but know that I will be jumping on your bed every morning until you have no other choice than to speak to me" Hanna now shouting her words with frustration. Emily was going to reply but she really had no energy and even if she did she wasn't sure what to say, she huffed and walked out of the kitchen and out of the house.

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When Ali pressed play on her iPod she knew it was going to be a risky move to play that song so Emily could hear but she didn't care, she loved the song almost as much as she loved Emily. It made her feel loved, special, it made her feel like everything was going to be okay with her and Emily because she knew Emily couldn't go from feeling these feelings to hating her, no matter what she had done to deserve it. She wanted Emily to know that she had received the song and that it meant something to her in return, maybe Emily would take it the wrong way but she didn't care. As she was getting dressed she dialled her manager. "Hey Steve, it's me. Yeah I'm just about settling in California, the weather is beautiful. Listen I need you to pull me some strings, I need a recording studio session, no not for release, its personal, I need it for myself. Can you sort it or not" Ali spoke down the phone and waited for the reply. "Ali I know you're on hiatus but you need to think about your career whilst your there, but yes I can have something sorted and I'll text you the details. Think about what I said, it's important for you, time away is not good in this industry people will forget you" Steve thinking like the manager he is. "I know Steve but there are more important things going on now than my career, I need the people I know to remember me first, I will speak to you soon and thanks again Steve" Ali put the phone down as she grabbed her keys and bag and headed out.

"Girls I've got a meeting with my label, I'll be back in a few hours, I'll bring home tea, bye" Ali shouted before leaving. "But Ali wait what about Em" Hanna shouted after her. "Don't worry I've got a plan" Alison winked as she closed the door and Hanna felt relief, She knew Ali had it in her and was so happy for once she wasn't running away she was staying and fighting for Emily.

Emily didn't know where she was going, she just started running, literally and theoretically, as fast as her feet could take her. Years ago when Emily felt the world was too much for her to handle she'd run to blow off her steam but recently she didn't even have to motivation to that, she usually turned to alcohol and partying or wallowing in self-pity. Running and running thoughts were swirling around her head, she really didn't know what was wrong with her, she never usually let things get to her as bad as they had recently, _'why would I be sad, why am I feeling like this, I'm living in a house with my bestest friends after all this time they are still here for me so why do I feel so alone, there must be something wrong with me'_ Emily was thinking and soon found herself running faster than before, her chest felt like it was going to collapse. As she came to a stop bowed over she started sobbing, gasping for breath as she couldn't go any further but she also felt like she couldn't go back, she knew she was pushing her friends away but she couldn't pretend to just be happy, to live in a house with Alison like she wasn't still in love with the girl who broke her heart knowing that she didn't love her back and Emily in this moment didn't see any way out, she walked to the bridge that covered the deep river below and just sat on the wall, she didn't really think that she wanted to jump but thought it wouldn't really matter if she did either. It felt like hours had passed since she had been sitting there and the sun had started to set giving the earth a warm orange glow, completely lost in her thoughts she didn't notice the sound of footsteps walking by her and sitting on the wall next to her.

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Alison had been in the studio for the past 4 hours, being here made her feel relaxed she felt like she was home, as soon as she stepped into that booth she felt all her worries and fears slipping away. She was here purely for Emily, she knew that words were no good anymore. She had never particularly been good at putting into words how she felt, that is why she used to send Emily songs, although to Emily it just looked like she was telling her to listen to this new song she loves, to Alison it was more than that, she was telling Emily that she loved her like really loved her, she was just too afraid back then to admit it. She was ready now though, she's ready to face her fear of love.

Although she still feels unworthy of love, she knows Emily deserves to be loved and she wants to be the one to do it. Finishing up for the day she thanks the guys for helping her and takes the CD in her bag proud of the songs she has just recorded and feels like now it will finally prove to Emily how she feels. Heading back to their home Ali is preparing of what she is going to do with the CD how she is going to explain to Emily, how she is going to get Emily to listen when she catches a girl out of the side of her eye, sat on a wall seeing only the back of her beautiful brown locks and she would recognise them anywhere, it was her Emily. ' _What on earth is she doing, why is she sat there alone you think the girl would have learned about danger by now'_ Alison thought as she pulled over to make her way to Emily and sat beside her.

At first she thought Emily must be really mad at her as she wouldn't even turn to look at Alison but then she realised that she wasn't here, emotionally, she was somewhere else and hadn't even noticed Ali sat next to her. She reached out her hand and placed in on Emily's back which shocked her out of her thoughts. Emily turned and looked at Ali her eyes were blood shot red and her face was puffy but her eyes were empty and for about the 100th time since Ali had arrived she felt her heart break. "Em, please don't push me away, I know i have been awful I know I have been MIA for the past 2 years and I know I have constantly treated you bad, please know I am really sorry I will spend the rest of my life showing you how sorry I am but please just speak to me, tell me how you feel"

Emily looked at Ali listening to her words. She felt truth in her words and she was certain that she saw hurt in those beautiful blue eyes. _'Has she really changed, does she really care'_ Emily thought but she had nothing left to lose so she started talking. "Ali…" Alison felt her heart flutter in her chest as Emily called her by her nickname for the first time since she arrived "…everything is wrong, absolutely everything, I thought I would be happy after charlotte, I thought I would be able to get on with my life, college was supposed to be where I found myself and have a ball but the past 2 years have been the worst of my life, I found myself wishing I was back in rosewood being tortured by A, how sick is that. I am completely alone, the girls they've moved on, they are all so happy in their lives and I never wanted to burden them, I didn't want to take away their happiness and you…" Emily emptied her whole heart to Alison she thought there was nothing Ali could say that could make her feel worse so she may as well tell the truth, Ali felt nervous as she knew the next words were going to be the worst. "…you Ali, you broke me, I loved you with all my heart. More than anyone I have ever loved before, I chose you over everyone, I stood by you, I supported you when everything came out about Charlotte and you let me know what it was like to have life with you before you closed me off and pushed me away to be alone, I thought the first time you left me was the worst I had felt but this, this time I had you back, I felt things with you I have never felt before, and for a time you acted like you felt those things too, for the first time I could see my happy future with you, I thought we was almost at the point of being together like really together, I left you that song, I gave you my feelings, bared my soul and you just acted like nothing had happened, not one phone call, not one text message. Absolutely nothing, I cannot fix my broken heart, and I have no motivation to do so. I've tried to, I drink and drink until I feel no more, I've been with other girls but that just makes me feel worse and I feel ashamed. I have felt nothing but sadness and shame since I left you in rosewood and the first time I've felt anything different was when I met your eyes in the kitchen last night. At first I thought wow, the girl of my dreams is sat right there in front of me and she looks beautiful..." Alison blushed but Emily remained serious, she knew she had to get this out. "… and then I felt anger, anger that I had let it be 2 years to set my eyes on you, anger that you had allowed the same. Sadness that you don't love me, at one point I thought maybe you did but then I realised you can't, you can't have ever loved me or you wouldn't allow this to happen, I have been awful to the girls, I know why they are here, they are all worried about me, Spencer has spent her whole life working towards college she wouldn't postpone it a year for nothing, but I can't let them in, I can't go back to having that relationship with them or you because I will just get happy and in a year you will all be gone and I will be alone again and I can't feel this again, my heart just won't take it, so I just ran, ran and ran until I ended here, sat on this bridge not even sure whether I wanted to jump or not. I must sound like I have lost my mind, I don't want to jump, but I also don't know what else to do. What do I do Ali?"

Emily finished and sighed like a massive weight had just been lifted from her shoulders and the tears rolled down her cheeks. Alison couldn't actually believe that she had just opened herself up so honestly when a few hours ago she couldn't speak a word to her. _'Wow Ali you literally are a douche, how could you let this happen. Emily is right how I can say I love her and have left her feeling like this for years. I can't believe my Emily is sat on this bridge finding a reason of not to jump, I am just the worst person. Stop, stop thinking about yourself Ali, Emily needs you to say something now'_ Ali thought to herself as Emily stopped talking and realised she needs to fill the silence now.

"Em, I-I, you haven't lost your mind, I don't think that at all. I can't tell you what to do, because I don't know myself but Thank you, thank you for being so honest with me, I am here to help you, I know I left you alone before but I promise I will not do that again, I never want you to feel so alone that you even have to think about hurting yourself again. I will be here every single time you need me, every time you feel sad, upset, and hurt, hey even when you feel happy I will be here. I promise that Emily with every bone in my body I promise I will not leave you alone, now please just come with me, I have something to show you." Ali said with such conviction in her voice whilst her arm covered Emily and guided her to the car.

They spent the rest of the journey in silence but Alison could see the clogs turning in Emily's mind and she wished she knew what the brunette was thinking. As they pulled up to the house Alison grabbed Emily's hand, Emily pulled away and tuned her head but this time Alison grabbed Emily's jaw to turn to face Ali. "Hey Em, listen to me, I don't know what you're thinking now and you don't have to tell me, but please believe me, everything that I said on that bridge was the truth, I am here for you, I know this, us isn't going to be fixed overnight but I promise I will work on it until we are fixed" Emily just nodded at ali and got out of the car walking into the house.

Aria, Spencer and Hanna were all stood at the window watching what was going on with Ali and Emily outside when they all shot away from the window as Emily walked into the house. "Hey Em, we are just about to make dinner what do you want?" Hanna said not wanting to ask about the exchange outside or why she had arrived back home with Ali. "nothing Han im not hungry, im just going to go upstairs for a while, thank you though" Emily said as she turned and smiled at Emily. Hanna noticed it was a half-smile but a smile none the less. Alison followed in behind Emily and just looked at the girls, she smiled but shook her head and followed Emily upstairs, and Spencer wasn't sure whether it was a good or bad thing why Ali was shaking her head but they decided to just leave the girls to it.

Alison walked up the stairs slowly, giving herself time to compose as she grabbed the envelope out of her bag. She knocked on Emily's door lightly before entering finding Emily sat on her bed just staring. "Em, im not in here to talk more, I know you don't need to right now, I just wanted to give you this. Please open it and feel free to come and speak to me once you have. Oh and Em, one more thing, this is the most truthful I have ever been please believe that" Ali said as she walked out the room and Emily raised her eyebrows in curiosity of what Ali had just passed her.


	6. The Letter

**A.N. Thank you all so much for reading, i am really enjoying writing this story and amazed by how many people have read it considering its my first ever one, story is moving in a different direction than i thought it was going to when i started writing it but i love it and i hope you do too. please keep leaving me reviews, any ideas you want in the story, in the next few chapters i think im going to do a karaoke scene so any songs in particular you want on it, Thank you all Again.. hope you enjoy!**

Emily stared at the envelope in her hands for a few seconds, looking at the perfect cursive in which Ali had written her name before she opened it. Inside was a letter and an iPod. _'What the bloody hell is this'_ Emily thought to herself as she unfolded the letter and began reading.

 **My Emily.**

 **This is going to be long, but its years in the making so bear with me. I have written this what feels like a thousand times over and can never seem to find the right words. They have been in my head all these years but I just cannot get them on the paper! Here goes…** **I don't think I can put in to words how much you really mean to me Em, I would do anything to protect you and keep you safe. From the moment we met I knew there was something special about you. I knew there was something special about all you girls, that's why I chose you to be my friends. But with you it was different, I grew closer to you in different ways than I did with the other girls, I found myself wanting to share with you the darkest parts of myself, for the first time ever I knew I could be honest with you and it wouldn't make you run, that scared me to death.** **As time went on and our relationship developed I soon realised your feelings for me, I knew you loved me, and being honest I liked how that made me feel. I used you. I made you ashamed of who you were because I was scared that once you was comfortable with yourself the world would know and I would lose you forever. I like the times we had that were just between me and you. I could show you the true parts of me but when I felt too exposed it scared me and I acted out and this hurt you. I would play with your feelings like it didn't matter, and it did Em it really did. When I saw the hurt in your eyes because of me it killed me.** **I soon realised that my feelings for you had grown to be similar of how you felt for me but I could never admit this. We were in high school Em, I would never have been able to stay at the top and have a weakness so I chose to ignore it, and then when I left you, I lost a piece of me too. It was so hard to leave you behind but I had to protect you, all of you. We know how the story goes from there.** **When charlotte was exposed, I didn't think I could break anymore. I had lost my whole family and I didn't know what to do to carry on and there you were again. Saving me. Making me feel like everything was going to be ok. I felt happiness with you that I have never felt before in my life, I saw the way you looked into my eyes and I could not be responsible for the amount of hurt I would eventually cause you, I knew that this time if I hurt you, you would never forgive me so I pushed you away, I let you leave for college and decided you were better off without me. I listened to that song you left me a thousand times over, I nearly called you so many times, I was scared, I was scared to feel these feelings for you and eventually I figured it was too late. I threw myself into my family, well charlotte and my music. I convinced myself that you would be fine, and when I heard from the girls that you wasn't it killed me.** **Aria gave me the chance to come and live in this house with you all, and I knew I wanted to reconnect with you girls, despite everything we all had such a special friendship and I wanted to experience that again. When I heard you left on our first night to go on a date I thought my heart was going to explode. To hear that you had someone else to love almost killed me, and when I saw you in the kitchen I couldn't believe my eyes, how beautiful you are still stuns me.** **I realise that now you are the broken one, and just like you had done with me those years ago. I intend to save you too. I know you may not believe me but Emily, I love you, I think I always have and I know I always will, from the very first day I met you I knew it. I was too scared to admit it all those years ago but im ready now. Im ready to love you, the same way you love me. I don't even deserved to be loved after all I have put you through, all the hurt I have caused and you still do. I think it is about time that you feel the same love from me as I from you.** **I have experienced what life is like with you and these past two years what it is like without you, life is just not the same when you are not around. Now I do not know what you was planning to do on that bridge tonight but if you ever feel that alone again just remember I am here, and I promise until my dying day I will always be here for you. I have never loved anyone as much as I love you Emily, it scares me to death but I am ready to face that fear. I don't know what I have done to deserve you but I will spend every day showing you how thankful I am.**

 **If these words aren't enough, please listen to these songs. They have always been able to express my feelings more than I ever could.**

 **Yours if you'll let me be**

 **Alison. X**

Emily could not believe her eyes as she read the letter and the tears started to fill. _Ali loves me._ It was everything she has ever wanted, everything she already knew but needed to hear. She needed to truthfully know how Ali felt. She had never felt so much honesty and for a moment just sat silently staring at the words on the paper before reaching down for the iPod and pressing play. A familiar song started playing and she recognised it previously as a song Ali had sent her many years ago and then an even more familiar voice started singing. _"I drove for miles just to find you and find myself, all these screams all these voices in my head, you gave me strength, gave me hope for a life time. I never was satisfied. This time won't you save me, this time won't you save me, baby I can feel myself giving up, giving up"._ Emily smiled as she thought back on the memory of Ali sending her this Nicki Minaj song the first time, and now she couldn't believe she was listening to Ali singing it having just confessed her love. It almost felt like she was dreaming. _"It's not your fault im a bitch, im a monster. Yes Im a beast and I feast when I conquer but im alone on my throne, all these riches I came this way, all this way just to say hey"._ Emily let out a little giggle as she heard Ali singing the lyrics basically calling herself a bitch. She also heard the truth and sadness that laced her beautiful voice and in that moment she had never felt closer to Alison. Emily skipped through a few more songs mainly by Adele. Alison knew how much Emily loved her and she knew the symbolism it had on their relationship. Emily spent the next two hours listening to the songs over and over not tiring of Alison's voice and she started thinking of what she was going to do next. She knew Alison had bared her soul in these songs and that she would be waiting nervously for some acknowledgement. She stood, wiping the tears from her eyes and headed to the door.

As she opened it she was met by a nervous looking Hanna, who was just about to knock on her door. "Ooh hey Em, I was just about to knock, you've been up here a while I was giving you space but I can't leave you alone, have you been crying?"

"listen Han, I know I have been awful to you all, I know you are only trying to help me, I swear I will make it up to you but right now I've just got something to do, so if you don't mind" Emily said as she stepped around Hanna and made her way to Alison's door.

Hanna smiled as she saw a glimmer of Emily, the real Emily that she hadn't seen for a long time, she wanted to ask more but as Emily made her way to Alison's room Hanna knew this was something she had to leave her to and she walked back downstairs to the other girls.

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"Guys, I think it's really happening, eek" Hanna blurted out excitedly as she joined Aria and Spencer in the living room.

"What is Han, what are you on about?" Spencer asks curiously.

"Emison!" Hanna sequels.

"What the fuck is Emison, are you on drugs Hanna?!" Spencer laughs at her friend who is making no sense.

"I'm just high on love, Spenc. How obvious do I have to be, Emison Emily and Alison, you know like Spoby and Haleb, even Ezria, they're our ship names" Hanna laughs getting far too excited.

"Ship names, I kinda like it, Ezria!" Aria laughs.

"Wait back to Emily and Alison what's happening, why is 'IT' happening?"

"Because DUHH, they left the house hours ago separately, they just happen to both return in Ali's car at the same time, Alison has been in and out of Em's bedroom barely 4 hours ago Emily wanted to kill her and now what do you hear, I'll tell you nothing, no shouting no raised voices and I've just bumped into Emily upstairs, given she's been crying but you know what I saw, I'll tell you that one as well, I saw Em, our Em she's there, her eyes, it's all happiness and I bet you any money it's because Emison are finally getting it on!" Hanna explains to the other girls why she is so excited.

"I love Emily and I want her to be happy but please Hanna don't make me picture an Emison sex scene in my head it's too much, Ali is not about to tarnish the image of our innocent Emily" Spencer laughs as they all feel their hearts a little lighter at the thought of getting Emily back.

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Emily stands at the door of Alison's bedroom, thinking in her head all the times that she had dreamt this exact moment, she wanted nothing more than to run into this room, swoop Ali off her feet and kiss her until there was not a single sound in the world, but first she had to deal with a few things.

She did in fact run into Ali's room and it almost scared Alison half to death as she jumped up off the window seat and turned to face Emily.

"Em, I-I, hey" Alison said as words failed her nervously waiting to see what Emily had to say about everything.

"How dare you!" Emily shouted

"Em, wait…" Alison tried to defend whatever it was Emily was shouting at her for before Emily cut back in.

"No Ali let me finish, how dare you feel these feelings in this letter…" Emily waving the letter in the air.

"How dare you feel these feelings towards me, for all of these years and not do one single thing about it, how dare you listen to the songs I send you knowing exactly how I feel about you, all the while you feel the same way and not say a thing. How dare you let me be broken without you for these past 2 years and do nothing to contact me" Emily shouts tears starting as she feels the frustration building

"But Em, you don't need me, you never have and I don't deserve you, you are much better off without me but I just needed to let you know" Alison says now crying as well

"That is not your decision to make Alison, look at me. Do I look better off to you? You don't have the right to tell me who I am better off without, who I should love. Especially if the person who I love has loved me back all these years and has been too goddam STUPID to admit it" Emily now face to face with Alison, noses almost touching as she shouts the last sentence, and for a few seconds they both stand breathing and looking into each other's eyes before Alison grabs Emily's face and sends their lips crashing into one and other.

The kiss was hard and desperate, like both lives depended on it. Alison rubbed her tongue along Emily's bottom lip asking for entrance and she complied allowing Ali to explore her mouth, gaining a moan from Emily in return.

"Ali…" Emily moaned as she came up for breath and Alison started making tracks down Emily's neck, sucking and biting as she went.

"Ali, we need to talk, please" Emily panted almost wishing she wasn't about to stop Alison from carrying on.

"Em, we can talk but I have waited years to do this, talking can wait" Alison said as she started sucking hard on her neck which Emily knew was sure to leave a mark.

"Your fault, not mine. Now talk" Emily said sternly as she pushed Alison away.

"Urgh, fine" Alison said rolling her eyes and she pulled back to look Emily in the eyes.

"Now Miss DiLaurentis, don't get shirty with me otherwise I might decide to go back to hating you and we'll have a miserable year in this house" Emily smirked.

Alison's eyes widened as she saw the mischief in Emily and wondered why all these years she was scared of this, of her. "What exactly is it you want to talk about Miss Fields" Ali smiled

"Oh I don't know really, how about we start with the massive bombshell letter you just dropped on me" Emily said sarcastically.

Alison sat back on the bed and knew that she couldn't coat this with sarcasm and mischief, it had to be as honest as the words on the paper. "Emily, every single word in the letter is the truth, every single word I sing in those songs are the truth"

"I believe you, I wouldn't be here randomly kissing you if I didn't, I am just particularly curious in a few words I read" Emily smiled

"And which might those be" Ali smiled back and catching the sight of her dimples, Emily thought she might just die in this moment.

"Oh I don't kn…" Emily playfully toying with Alison but before she could finish Ali interrupted.

"I love you Emily Fields, Always have, Always will" Alison smiled bigger than she ever had before "Are those the ones you were talking about?"

Hearing the actual words come out of Alison's mouth made Emily almost spontaneously combust, not really sure she was hearing correctly. "Alison look how easy this is, a few hours ago, before I left for my run I wanted to rip your head off, if it wasn't for the fact you was out I would have done, and just like that with 3 small words the words I have been dreaming about hearing from your mouth for years and I am back to Emily, I can see parts of myself I forgot even existed if I wasn't so happy I would be so mad with you, how can I still let you control me like this" Emily said with pure honesty in her voice.

"Emily don't you see, this isn't easy, quite the opposite in fact it is the hardest thing I have ever done, I am Alison DiLaurentis, incapable of love but you Emily, you make me different you make me better and that terrifies me. I built up this defence, if no one loves me, no one can hurt me, but you have always saw right through that. I let you leave not knowing my true feelings because I could not stand the thought of hurting the one truly kind and pure thing in my life but looking into your eyes the other night I saw something that was much worse than hurt, it was nothing you had given up and I decided that if I don't make this up to you now if I don't spend the rest of my days showing you that your worth it, I would never live with myself, and I don't think that Hanna, Aria and Spencer would live with me either" Alison said looking deep into Emily eyes.

"And Emily this isn't about control, I never want you to feel controlled by me ever. I was a 14 year old girl who was scared and confused and my only instinct was to fight, I used you for my advantage, now I know who I am, I am a woman who happens to be in love with her best friend who is also a woman, and the most hottest woman I have ever set eyes on" Alison smirked but she hoped that she was getting through to Emily and she leaned in for another kiss. Emily of course kissed back, this time however it was not needy or desperate, it was soft and passionate, delicate even and Alison felt nothing but love.

"Ali, I believe you, I really do and im so happy that you are here, but this, us we are going to take time" Emily says and although she is telling the truth she does feel happy, she can also feel deep down that the broken parts of her are still broken and it's going to take a lot to mend.

"I know that, the girls already told me that running in here and saying I love you wouldn't fix this and I know, I have written it down I have told you, I am going to be here for you to wipe every tear and join in on every laughter"

"Wait the girls?! Oh god what have they been saying? Did they make you do this?" Emily says feeling the pit of her stomach that Ali didn't really want this.

Alison just smiled she knew Emily well enough now to read her like a book and could see the doubt in her eyes. She grabbed hold of her hands and held tight. "Emily, I have wanted to do this for as long as I can remember, the girls they just gave me a push in the right direction, Hanna in fact sold me by telling me that I would be foolish to miss out on your, shall we say special skills" Alison winking at Emily which of course made her blush the colour crimson. "Oh did she, now it's going to be her I kill!" Emily says standing up from the bed and heading for the door.

Ali grabbed her by the wrist to hold her back "Em wait, before we go out there, before we decide what happens from here, with us whatever we are, I need to get to know you, the you over the past two years, I need to become your best friend again before we move on with anything else ok?" Alison says softly not sure of Emily's reaction. "I totally agree Ali, i want to know every detail of your life, everything that's been happening with Charlotte, your singing the lot" Emily smiles and it almost turns into a frown before she realises.

"Em what's wrong? We don't have to talk about Charlotte its fine honestly"

"No Ali, it's not that but does being your friend mean I can't kiss you?" Emily asks and it makes Ali smile so much, pulling Emily down to sit right on her knee she grabs her face and pulls her in for a kiss that could have lasted for a second or an hour they weren't quite sure, only that it felt truly magical. Pulling away Alison says "Has being friends ever stopped us before" smirking now at the past "now let's go down stairs, we have got 3 friends that I know are going to burst in here if we keep them waiting any longer"

Emily pulls Ali in for a hug smelling her vanilla scented hair and in this moment she feels home.


	7. Emison

**A.N. Just a quick note to say thanks for reading, still loving writing this story, taking a little longer to develop than i thought but i promise the Emison smutt is on its way :) keep review please. xx**

Emily and Alison walk towards the door and can hear hurried footsteps as they do, smirking at each other Emily runs out to find their 3 best friends hurrying themselves downstairs and out of sight. "Hanna Marin, Spencer Hastings and Aria Montgomery, I suggest you turn your arses around right now and get back here!" Emily shouts but cannot contain her giggles as the girls turn round looking like naughty children being shouted at. "I just want to make one thing clear, Alison and I, we are friends again and friends only" "But what about Emison" Hanna butts in. "Emison?" Ali questions. "Im not even going to pretend I want to know what that is! we have talked, Im sure you all 'accidentally' heard with your ears pressed up against the door but I don't know Ali and before anything happens we need to get back to being best friends that includes all of us, I know I've been a bit hard to get along with recently but im working on it and I plan on making this the best year of our lives so far, so we are going to get drunk, eat nice food, visit places and have a continual sleep over and I do not want to hear any talk of mine and Ali's relationship status, got it Han?" Emily laughs. "Woah, hold up a minuet why is that directed at only me, I can do as im told" Hanna defends herself. "I may not know Ali much anymore but Hanna I know you and I know you just can't help the things that come out of your mouth, I still love you for it" Emily says as she playfully hits Hanna and heads downstairs. "Oh Emily if you don't stop flirting with me I might have to just kiss you myself" "EXIBIT A" all of the girls shout at once and laugh following Emily downstairs.

The girls all gathered round in the living room with various bottles of wine laughing and crying remembering back on old memories. Conversations between the girls were so easy, each talked about what they had been up to in college, Alison telling some exciting stories about her music career thus far and also mentioned bits and pieces on charlotte not wanting to dampen the mood too much. Hanna had stories to tell about her internships in the fashion world and of course came out with some typical Hanna Marin one liners. When all the girls looked around the room at each other they could do nothing but smile, knowing that these 5 girls were made for each other, they just fit like parts of a puzzle all bringing something special to their friendship and Spencer in particular noticed how nice it was to be spending time with Alison, she was the first to admit that in their teenage years her and Ali didn't get on the best but as time went on they came to realise that their love hate relationship was what made them, they strived to better each other and would defend each other at all costs.

4 or so bottle of wines in and all the girls were admittedly tipsy and now on the subject of how they were going to spend their year together. From days out to parties the girls debated. Emily sat listening for a while before interrupting. "To be honest, I have felt so lonely for a long time I am just happy that every night I get to go to bed knowing you guys are just in the next room and every day we get to wake up and share morning together, or afternoon in Hanna's case. I am looking forward to doing nothing with you all, cooking dinner, watching movies that kind of thing just knowing I have my four best friends with me is enough" Emily smiled thinking about how much she truly loved these girls. "Awh Em you always were a sap, that's why I love you" Alison added sipping on her wine and nearly choking as she realised what she had just said out loud and in front of the other girls. Emily blushed and the other girls just gave each other a knowing look. "Uhh excuse me a minuet" Alison said scrambling and make her way outside through the French doors. The air was warm and the sun had set, the garden was peaceful the only light coming from that which lit the pool Alison sat down on the garden furniture and was just quiet in her own thoughts taking in her beautiful surroundings realising how lucky she was.

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"Sooo I'm just going to say it, I know talk of Emison is banned but did Ali just drop the L bomb in front of us all tonight" Hanna adds now drunk and unable to control what comes out of her mouth.

"I'll let this one go Hanna but yes she did, that's not the part that concerns me she'd told me already tonight twice, what im bothered about was her reaction when she said it, she wanted the whole ground to swallow her up I don't know why" Emily said a little confused at what had just happened

"Awh she's said it twice? How did that go down Em? I know you think we were listening but I didn't hear anything and I want to know, you know how romantic I am?" Aria adds feeling all warm and fuzzy.

"It was the most amazing thing I've ever heard Aria, everything I have ever waited for and she told me so honestly, actually she told me in a letter first, then a song and then to my face. You know how long I have loved her for and to hear it back, I can't put in to words how I feel" Emily smiling thinking about the moment she read Ali's letter.

"You're smiling like an idiot and you're all warm and fuzzy can I just ask why are you choosing to be just friends again?" Spencer states the obvious.

"Because Spenc, I don't know her, I can't just go from being so sad and hating her to being her girl... girlfriend in a matter of minutes I need to build our friendship first" Emily sounds more like she's convincing herself.

"Em, your heart knows every part of Alison's, you have been friends since we were 13 years old. You have known the real Ali before she even knew herself, I don't think there is much more you need to build, I think you're scared, I think she's scared and you need to just man up" Spencer says and Emily knows that this is the truth. "Maybe your right Spenc" "I know im right, now get outside and tell your girl that" Spencer pushed Emily in the direction of Ali. "Wait before I go Han, Emison what the fuck is that" "Its Emily and Alison Duhh, your relationship name, like mine is Haleb" Hanna laughs. "Emison, got it" Emily laughs and heads out the door.

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Alison is sat staring almost in a trance and Emily pulls up a seat next to her.

"Hey what's going on in that mind of yours" Emily asks.

"Oh hey Em, I've had one too many to drink I think, I needed to come out for some fresh air just thinking" Ali turns to look at Emily and gets lost in her eyes. "Just thinking is not a good enough answer for me, what happened in there, when you said that" Emily pushes Ali. "Oh yeah, im sorry I didn't mean to over step it, I kind of shocked myself it just came out, I know we're just friends right now and that wasn't the best thing to be saying, I couldn't deal with Hanna looking at me so I just came out for a breather" Ali says not breaking eye contact with Emily.

"It's not a big deal Ali, friends can say I love you too, I tell Han, Spenc and Aria that I love them all the time" reassuring Ali that it was ok. "Yeah Em I know, but I don't love you like a friend and im pretty certain you don't want to jump their bones when you say it either"

Ali says now looking to the ground and blushing. Emily grabs Ali's jaw and brings her up to meet her lips, kissing her softly at first. Alison eyes close and thinking to herself _'this can't be real I must be dreaming, how the hell in the space of two days can I go from watching Emily walk in drunk from a date to being drunk with Emily right now and kissing her, like this'_ Without realising it the kiss had turned much more passionate and Ali's arms were now trailing up and down Emily's back whilst Emily's hand was resting on Ali's thigh. "Stop we can't do this" Ali says whilst pulling away to catch her breath. "Do what" Emily smirks "I thought kissing was part of our friendship". "Not kissing like that, I could literally tear your clothes of right here right now" Ali says still catching up with her breath. "And the problem with that is…" Emily's eyes now mischievous and dark with lust. "Em seriously, im not saying I don't want to because God I do I really do but we have agreed I need to be your friend, we need to build our relationship, I can't ruin this I just can't" Ali says now hanging her head at the thought. Emily grabs hold of Ali's hand and pulls her in for a hug.

"Alison 2 hours ago I completely agreed with you, but the girls they…" Alison interrupts "The girls?! What have they said I knew it! I knew they would talk about us" Alison says half laughing and half dreading what they had to say "Well actually they are very wise and it seems they know us better than we do, I told them how you told me you loved me and spencer said why the hell are we being friends, I explained our need to get to know each other and she kindly reminded me that I have always known you, better than you know yourself, and you know what Ali, I have, I know everything about you, I know that you say your favourite colour is pink, I know your real favourite colour is yellow, I know your favourite book is great expectations, I know your favourite movie is the notebook, I know that you love Chinese food and hate Indian food, I know you secretly hate horror films even though you act like you love them. I know that you love hiking and being outdoors, I know you love to write, I know you hate pineapple on pizza, I know your scared of the dark, I know that you love getting your back tickled, I know that you have two favourite shampoo flavours, strawberry and vanilla, I know that you miss your mom, I know you hate being alone and I know that deep down you care what people think of you and would hate for someone to dislike you" Emily says with such pride at how well she knows the blonde currently in her arms. "Emily Fields, how the hell do you know such things about me" Alison says turning and looking at Emily with such love in her eyes. "Ali I have been in love with you since I can remember, every detail of you is important to me, I remember it all" "I don't know how I got so lucky that's what I was just thinking before you came out here, how did I, I was such an awful person and some awful things have happened to me, but I have you, I have the most amazing friends, how the hell did it happen?" Ali thinking out loud but not really needing an answer. "For the record I do actually love watching horror films when I am with you that way we get to cuddle up" Alison smiles at Emily.

"See Ali, we know each other, we don't need to wait for anything to happen while we become friends, we already are, what we need to learn how is how to be each other's G-girlfriend" Emily says nervously uttering the last word as she wasn't sure how Ali would take it. Alison didn't expect to feel like she did when she heard the word girlfriend come out of Emily's mouth, it made her feel like she was something to someone, it made her nervous but it also made her feel incredibly happy. "Girlfriend?" Alison questions. "Well uhm yeah-er I mean, not if…" Emily stutters herself through the sentence. "Oh for God sakes Em just shut up and kiss me" Ali says before crashing her lips into Emily's and embracing her just like before. Emily could feel Alison smirking into her mouth and pulled away to see what she was smiling at. "What's up Ali" Emily questions. "Nothing Em, I just realised that I am incredibly happy and I would love for you to be my girlfriend" Alison says hugging Emily tighter than ever before.

"Ali, I think that we should tell the girls we are still just being friends, I can't deal with their constant questions and snide remarks, is that ok" Worried at the response, Emily looks away. "Actually Em, we could have real fun with this, since the girls think they know so much about our relationship, lets kinda prove them wrong, we'll be the best of friends and I will sneak my hugs and kisses when I can, that way it will be so much more special it will be just between us, of course when the time is right we can tell them that they were definitely a 100% right about us" Alison laughed at her plan to get the girls back. "I like the sound of that, so you are my friend and not my secret girlfriend who I just can't keep my hands off and we are definitely not Emison deal" "Deal! … Wait you know what Emison is? Please explain it to me, im missing out" Alison added with a little pout and Emily thought to herself she would never get tired of Alison ever. "Oh yeah, Hanna explained to me just before I came out here, Emison is our relationship name, its Emily and Alison mixed together" Emily laughs thinking about Hanna. "I love it!" Alison laughs as she stands up to head inside.

"Come on bestie, time to put on a show" she winked at Em and walked back into the house.


	8. Just Friends'

**A.N so this is a fairly short chapter, nothing major happening but im just loving writing and uploading this story, thank you so much to everyone who's reading and reviewing this story! Would love if Emison could turn out like this! any ideas or input of what will go down at the party let me know, id love for people to give me ideas. please keep reviewing : ) thank you!**

"Here come the lovers Spencer shouts as Ali and Emily walk back into the living room where their friends are still sharing stories and wine.

"Ooh girls I could cut the sexual tension with a knife, did you not get it on out there" Hanna laughs wickedly eyeing Emily.

"Haa-Haa hilarious Han I almost forgot to laugh! Actually me and Emily had a good long chat, right now we are very lucky to have each other as friends" Ali replies

"Yeah and regardless of how well you think you know us, SPENCER, we know us far better, strictly friends and that would be all, yet again, I have to say on the subject, now who has drank my wine and who is going to fill it up" Emily adds putting a stop to the conversation.

"Oh you boring bitches, I was getting excited to live my sex life vicariously through you until Caleb gets here, I'll have to get myself off in other ways now, great thanks for being so selfish" Hanna laughs and Emily just gives her the eye. Emily and Ali sat down with the girls on the sofa, joining in with conversation, well Emily was, Alison was doing a brilliant job of pretending to listen and adding 'yes' and 'really' every now and then whilst being far more occupied with secretly tracing circles on Emily's hand which lay next to leg on the chair. As the night drawn to a close Emily was the first to head to bed she was physically tired but emotionally she was exhausted, it had been the longest day. This morning she hated Alison and couldn't look at her and tonight a mere 12 or so hours later was with Ali as her girlfriend, she had felt every emotion possible and just wanted to switch off, saying goodnight she went upstairs and collapsed onto her bed. When Emily left Aria, Spencer and Hanna turned to Alison and looked as if they were going to attack her, not satisfied with Emily's answer of being just friends they thought they could break their friend who had openly admitted to being in love with Emily earlier that day

"So Alison come on tell us" Aria started off

"I simply do not know what you are talking about" Alison smirked showing her famously dimples

"You can't actually think we believe that bullshit excuse Emily has just given us, there is no way Emily is this happy without the prospect of getting some from you" Hanna laughed

"Hanna seriously, why are you so bothered about mine and Emily's sex life, when is Caleb coming again you need to get some" laughing Alison turned away from the girls eye contact feeling like she was under interrogation

"Do you know what your mistake was just then Ali, you referred to the sex life as yours and Emily's insinuating there was a yours to talk about in the first place" Hanna smiled proudly feeling like she had caught her friend out

"No actually I was pointing out that your constantly referring to us as 'getting some' relationships aren't all about sex you know" Alison snipped back not one to be beaten.

"I think what Hanna is getting at Ali is that after we spoke today about Emily, you left going to win your girl, Emily had left the house in such a state we didn't even recognise who she was, she was in a dark place and now tonight she is back to her old self, you have been together all night without having one bad word to say, your actually ' _friends'_ you have been alone with each other most of the night and not one argument have we heard since you arrived back now you're telling us there is nothing going on and you are just remaining friends, what did you say? How did you get her to even talk to you? How did you bring her back?" Spencer talking fast now with a million thoughts running around her head

"Jesus Christ guys, all the years of you trying to figure out who A was has turned you into freakin detectives, what has happened between me and Emily tonight is just that, between me and Emily. Yes I love her and I promised to make things right, she is by no means 'fixed' she is still in a dark place don't forget that but she's smiling again, that's my job done" Alison said final as if to end the conversation

"But come on Ali we wanna know what happened, please my romantic heart" Aria fluttered her eye lids at Alison to get her own way

"If you must know I recorded a song for her and written her a letter, just to explain everything I am no good with words and before you ask no you can't hear it and no you can't read it, there is a lot of history between me and Emily which evidently you think you know all about but we have agreed we are sticking as friends we are happy with that and you should be too now if you don't mind, I am going to bed, goodnight" Ali stood and turned on her heel to leave the room heading upstairs

"Awh..." she heard Aria call.

"I'm soooo getting my hands on that CD" Hanna chuckled and Alison walked off with a massive smirk on her face.

As she got to her room she too also realised what a long day it had been, Emily had gone through the emotions but so had she, she effectively came out, well fell out of the closet to her friends and the love of her life, she bared her soul and fought for the one she loved and then had to sit all night with a slightly intoxicated beautifully half-dressed Emily and keep her hands to herself so not to fuel the fire of their friends. ' _I need sleep!'_ Alison thought to herself but as she lay in bed she couldn't rest, she headed for her balcony with her iPod on and just sat staring at the world with her thoughts.

All the stress of the day washing from her body and just then she realised where she was sitting, on the balcony that joined onto the room next to hers, Emily's room. _'How convenient this is, a conjoining balcony with my secret lover'_ Alison smirked to herself as she stood up and lightly knocked on the French doors.

Emily nearly jumped out of her skin when she heard the knocking on her door as she lay quietly in the dark, standing up and opening the doors she was greeted by an extra especially beautiful looking Alison, the moonlight gleaming in her eyes. "Oh hello beautiful, what are you doing on my balcony" Emily asked Alison now a little confused. "Actually it is our balcony, we just _happen_ to share it, come sit with me" Emily grabbed her blanket and sat with Alison, both in silence just staring out but cuddling each other.

"Did you get a grilling from the girls when I left?" Emily asked already knowing the answer.

"Yes I fucking did! But I gave as good as I got, hopefully they don't push it anymore" Alison laughed

"I'm happy you know Ali"

"I know"

Alison turned to face Emily again circling her hand as their lips met each other, this kiss was nothing like what they had shared previously, it was soft and slow and full of love and it took Emily's breath away. A single tear fell from her eye and Alison felt it on her cheek

"Em, what's wrong please don't cry"

"I have never been touched like that by you before, I'm just feeling a million different emotions today, I mean it I am happy but I can feel something niggling at the back of my mind and sadness just washes over me and I don't know why" Emily says truthfully looking at Alison

Hearing Emily talk made Ali's heart skip a beat. "Emily I intend to touch you like that for the rest of my life, I am going to show you how much I love you. I don't want you to feel sad but I know you will in one whole day you have come a long way, we both have and things don't just fix that easy but we will work on it, both of us together, when you are feeling sad come to this balcony and I will be there" Alison lent and gave Emily another kiss on the lips and then just held her.

"It will never grow old hearing you say that, and I love you too and Ali, thank you" Emily said and let out a yawn

"I will never tire of saying it, I promise you every night from now til forever I will wish you good night and tell you how much I love you, now get to bed princess and I will see you in the morning" Alison smiled and stood up directing Emily to her door.

Emily leaned in for a kiss and walked inside. Alison turned and walked into her room before quickly turning round "Uh Em…" "Yes Ali" "Goodnight, I love you" Ali smiled and closed her door.

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2 weeks had past and they had been pretty uneventful and the girls absolutely loved it. Last time they were together they never had the chance to sit and do nothing with each other like normal friends did, they tried as much as they could to hang out, have sleep overs and shopping you know normal things but it usually always ended up in conspiracies, an A text or an A hunt, this was different they were all free and it felt so good, they had spent their time having BBQ's on the beach, movie marathons and lots of wine! Caleb, Ezra and Toby were on the way to come and see the girl's house and since Hanna, Aria and Spencer hadn't seen their other half's for a good few weeks they were excited to say the least.

"What time do the boys arrive?" Alison asked whilst everyone sat around the breakfast bar

"Well Toby is on his way now, he should be hear by noon, I think Caleb and Ezra are going to be here for 5 tonight right Han?" Spencer said

"Yeah I've just text Caleb now, he's picking up Fitz in an hour then they are heading here im so excited! We should totally throw a party tonight" Hanna said excitedly

"Oh my god Han that is the best idea you have had all week, I can't believe we've lived here for 2 weeks and are yet to throw a party, this is the ideal party house!" Aria added

"Yeah but who are we inviting it's hardly a party with the 5 of us and your better halves" Alison asked.

"Well actually my friends from college have been asking to meet up with me, I could invite a few of them, they are always up for a party and they can invite friends too, the more the merrier I say" Emily added.

Alison felt a twinge in her stomach and knew it was somewhere between jealousy and nervousness. She had got an idea of what Emily's friends were like and knew they was a major possibility that one or more of them had slept with Emily and mixed with alcohol she did not like that idea at all, especially when she couldn't claim a stake on her girl. Pushing this aside she simply responded "Good Idea, I'll go shopping in a minuet and get the resources, what's a party without food or alcohol!"

All the girls smiled getting excited about the idea of hosting their first party and having some fun!


	9. The Party

**A.N. thank you all for the lovely reviews, i have been reading so many fanfics recently getting loads of inspiration, hope you are enjoying this story so far, if anyone has any prompts feel free to leave it in a review, and thanks again :)**

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"Where is my sexy as hell girlfriend" Caleb shouted as he walked through the door with Ezra. Hanna ran through the whole house and jumped into Caleb's arms planting a long and hard kiss on his lips. "Baby I have missed you so much" Caleb said whilst lifting Hanna and twirling her in his arms. "I'm so happy you're here, come in let me show you around" Hanna said hurrying him off to give him the tour, Caleb shouting hey to all the other girls as he past. When Aria realised that Fitz had arrived there was a similar show of affections, hugs and kisses and Aria took Ezra in to the living room to join the rest of the girls and toby.

Alison was in the kitchen preparing all the food and drinks when the boys arrived. Popping her head round the corner to shout hey to them. Back when Alison came back 'from the dead' her relationship with many people was hard but especially with Ezra, Caleb and Toby for she made each of their lives hell in one way or another. Caleb simply hated her for making his girlfriend's life a misery. Ezra for clearly obvious reasons was not keen on being remotely close with her and Toby although thankful for how his life turned out as a result of things that had gone down with Alison still wanted nothing to do with her and warned Spencer on many occasions how toxic she was.

However when the girls were taken hostage and held in the doll house, Alison put her own life and safety in danger to get them back, she had a forced alliance with the boys as they fought to get the girls back and they could see she had really changed. It was quite literally one of the first truly self-less things she had ever done. As she rebuilt her relationships with her 4 friends she also rebuilt her relationship with their better halves, excluding Paige obviously and they had all become really tight before heading off to college actually enjoying each other's company so it was nice to see them again. "Hey beautiful what are you doing in here all alone" Emily whispered to Ali as she walked behind her and wrapped her arms around her waist and placed her head on Ali's shoulder. "What are you doing, they could totally walk in right now and we'd be busted" Ali smiled as she turned to face Emily. "You are kidding, they're so engrossed in their boyfriends I don't think they'd even notice if we stood in front of them kissing" Emily laughed as she pulled Ali into her. "Hmm… I'd like to test that theory" Ali said as she grabbed Emily's face and pulled her in for a kiss. Considering how little the two had been touching and kissing each other things always got heated quickly whenever they had a chance although nothing had ever gone further yet. Ali was now pushing Emily into the kitchen worktops whilst rubbing her hands up and down Emily's back and deepening their kiss. Emily felt hot all of a sudden and reciprocated Alison's actions, letting out a moan. Just as things were getting good Ali pulled back like she always did. "Emily as much as I enjoy kissing you like that, we have our 3 friends in the room right next door and there is food waiting to be cooked for the guests due to arrive any minuet. How many of your friends are coming by the way?" Alison asked as she turned on Emily and started grabbing things out of the fridge. "Oh you're such a spoil sport, getting caught is half of the fun" Emily laughed as she smacked Alison on the butt and it made her jump. "And oh erm I dunno about 20, or erm maybe 30 depending on how many people they bring" Emily grabbed some of the things out of Ali's hand and started preparing the salads. "30 guests, you've got to be joking me! That means your totally playing it down and there's going to be at least 50 of them show up, im totally not prepared for that" Alison started stressing and rushing round. "Ali, Ali, slow down. Stop stressing, I know these people, well I know a couple of them, they don't want fancy food, they want beer, music and a good time and that's what we are going to give them, now you get your pretty little ass up those stairs and dressed and I will finish off in here" Emily ordered Ali. "Yes Miss Fields" Alison saluted to Emily laughing and headed upstairs to get ready.

As Alison got to her room she could hear her friends laughing down stairs and she swore she had never felt happier in this moment. She couldn't believe that she was here, with them all, and not as a second thought and not because she scared them into inviting her but because they wanted her to be, because she lived with them. Alison being Alison took her time getting ready and could hear that guest's had already arrived as she was making her way downstairs, everything had got louder and darker and it looked like any other party she had been to before, she had a feeling it was going to be a good one, pushing the thoughts of running into any of Emily's ex-lovers tonight out of her head.

x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x

Emily was helping herself to a drink as she turned and caught Ali walking down the stairs. The sight quite literally took her breath away, her golden blonde locks perfectly curled past her shoulders, her make up done to perfection, smoky effect seriously made those crystal clear blue eyes stand out and her dress, that dress. It was black and perfectly fitted, highlighting her amazing cleavage, cut out panels showing off her toned abs, tighten at the waist and loose around her butt finishing just above her knee. _'Wow'_ Emily thought to herself as she watched her girl walk down the stairs, she almost had to remember to shut her mouth before her jaw hit the floor. Alison walked up to her with a smirk on her face. "Uhm Hello Emily my eyes are right here" "Ali yes I know but you're body, Wow, you look… so sexy right now" Emily cringed as she realised what she just said but couldn't help herself and she felt so smug that the beauty stood in front of her was actually hers. "Well you don't look so bad yourself" Ali said as she reached her hand and placed in on Emily's lower back. Both the girls breathing started to change as they took the sight of each other in. "Emily Fields I swear to god if we don't move now I am going to rip your clothes off you hear and now" Alison panted at Emily. "I could totally deal with that" Emily raised her eyebrows playing with Alison and she was just about to lean in for a kiss when someone interrupted them. "Uh, Hey Emily, your friends told me I would find you in here with the drinks, I wanted to say hi" A very talk and very flawless looking dark haired girl stood in front of Ali and Emily and Ali felt a horrible feeling in stomach, it was unfamiliar though, was it…jealousy?!. "Oh Becca h-hey, I was just… never mind how are you, thanks for coming" Emily said avoiding eye contact with Alison. ' _Becca? As in hot date Becca, she invited her, you have got to be kidding me, and she's hot too, this is going to be a disaster'_ Alison had a million thoughts running through her head and Emily was worried as she knew what Alison would be thinking and she seriously wasn't prepared for a show down between her ex booty call and her current secret girlfriend. "Yeah of course Em I'd always be here, I was a little shocked I had an invite since you hadn't replied to my text messages but im over it now, maybe you'll get lucky tonight" Becca winked and then walked off with a drink in hand _'HELL NO! She did not just call MY Emily, Em?! And who the hell does she think she's winking at'_ Ali could feel her cheeks burn as she headed off to follow Becca and put her in her place. However before she could go Emily grabbed her arm and pulled her into a hug, she could feel that Alison wasn't returning it and instead hung her head. "Hey, hey look at me" Emily said whilst holding Ali's cheeks in her hand and pulling her face up to Emily's eyes. "Why did you invite her Emily, who the hell does she think she is, flirting with you so obviously, she's flawless and she knows it, I want to kill her right now, urgh" Alison could feel herself getting mad, and even more mad at that fact because she was trying to prove that she had changed. "Ali, listen to me, Becca is my friend, yes I have hooked up with her but only because I was feeling so bad about myself, and afterwards it would only make me feel worse, admittedly she is very pretty but Ali you are perfect you are so sexy and you are mine!" Emily said placing a passionate kiss on Alison lips trying to convince her of everything she was saying.

Ali pulled away feeling breathless and stupid for being insecure. "Emily, stop, anyone can walk in and we both aren't ready for us to be public, I trust you I really do, it's just hard how can I claim my steak on you! Especially when you are looking like you are right now everyone will be after you" Alison said realising how pathetic she was sounding. "I think I have more to worry about than you, your boobs…in that dress… WOW" Emily smiled and her eyes wandered down to Alison's chest. Ali blushed and walked away, turning before she heading in the lounge saying "don't forget your mind Fields" and winked. Emily smile was bigger than she ever had before as she followed into the lounge to be with all of their guests.

Hours had past and the party was far from quieting down, everyone was getting more and more drunk and Hanna, Spencer and Aria were getting increasingly more touchy feely with their partners. Emily felt kinda jealous when she watched them but was happy for them, she knew her friends had left their boyfriends and their lives to come and help Emily and she was so glad, she was happy they were able to come and be together now. Hanna as usual was the loudest person there, this always happened when she had a drink, she was Hanna x 1000! It was full on but she always made everyone laugh, as some of the guest had spread out and were now in the kitchen and hanging around the pool Hanna had a thought pop into her head. "Oh my god, I have just had the best idea, let's play truth or dare, I'll be the TOD master and the last person to down their shot when I say so has to do the truth or dare" Hanna clapped happily excited at playing this game, she had always loved it when they were younger. "Exactly how is that fair" Spencer piped up and Emily was glad she did because to be honest she hated playing this game and she was terrible at doing shots. "Because SPENCER, I decided the game so I make up the rules, now GO down it" Hanna shouted and everyone jumped to grab their shots, Emily quite surprised she wasn't last looked up to find that the last person to down their shot was… Becca! ' _Damn it!'_ Emily thought ' _please Hanna don't be terrible'_ "Okay Becca, truth or dare". "I'm always a dare kind of girl, hit me" Becca answered confidently. "I dare you to… dirty dance with Emily, right now" Hanna smiled knowing she was about to push some buttons but she wanted to prove her theory right, she looked for the look on Alison's face which was surprisingly blank and she knew that the only reason Emily wouldn't refuse would be for Ali, she knew they didn't want their relationship to be a known thing yet and Emily couldn't say no or it would look suspicious, it was kind of cruel of Hanna when she thought about it but she needed to know. ' _For fuck sake Hanna I am going to kill you'_ Emily thought as she looked over at Alison and could not get anything from her face.

"Easy as pie, we've done it plenty of times before haven't we Em" Becca said whilst winking again towards Emily and it took everything in Alison to not stand up and rip her head off. "Fine" Emily said as she stood up and headed towards Becca. At first Emily started dancing with Becca shyly not wanting to be too full on until Hanna shouted "Make it convincing or you both get another dare". Rolling her eyes Emily continued as Becca grabbed her by her waist and pulled her closer, the two girls start grinding in unison and Becca's hands slowly make their way up Emily's back lift Emily's arms up in the air and Emily dropped her head back whilst grinding harder on Becca.

Alison could not look for a second longer and had a mixture of anger and sadness as she stood up and left the room, Emily of course, noticed straight away and realised that she just got totally lost in the moment and completely forgot about how awful that must have looked for Ali. "Hanna what the hell" she shouted towards Hanna as she left the room and ran after Ali. "Wait please" Emily shouted after Ali as she made her way to the stairs. "Alison WAIT" Emily shouted again and grabbed Alison's arm turning her around. "Emily what the hell was that, don't tell me it was nothing, I can't believe you've just made me watch that" Alison said with tears running down her cheeks. Emily grabbed Alison's cheek and rubbed the tears away "Ali, Hanna dared her I didn't want her to dare me again I had to and then I just got lost in it, im sorry, please come back in" Emily said as she crashed her lips against Ali's this must have been their 10th kiss today but it was so rough and desperate, and _hot!_ Emily's hands roamed Alison's thighs and left a trail of Goosebumps where she had touched. " _Emily…"_ Ali moaned concentrating on Emily's hands on her bare skin. "Please come back in and we will show Hanna how to seriously play truth or dare" Emily broke away from the kiss and looked darkly into Alison's eyes. Ali was confused and not sure what Emily had in mind. As the girls stood up Emily added "Just make sure you drink your shot last and pick dare" Emily winked and they walked back into the lounge.

"Okay Hanna we have already had enough of you as TOD master, so im doing it now! Drink!" Emily shouted to a startled looking Hanna and as requested everyone drank, Ali being last just as she was told. "Oh dear, Alison was last, Truth or Dare Ali" Emily smirked. "Dare" Alison said nervously still absolutely no idea what was coming next.

"Ok, I dare you to…stand up and kiss the person in this room that you are in love with until they can't breathe or remember their own name" Emily said raising her eyebrow.

Alison's eyes, along with everyone else's shot open and her mouth nearly touched the floor, what the hell was Emily doing? She stood up complying anyway.

For a minuet she stood still and felt everyone eyes on her wondering where and who she was going to walk to but she did not take her eyes off Emily and the girls knew what was about to happen…. Kind of.

Alison moved slowly making her way over to Emily, stopping as she made it to just in front of the brunette. Emily looked up at Alison and could see that her perfect blue eyes were now dark with lust. Alison parted her legs and straddled Emily's knee. The blonde turned her head to look around the room and caught Becca whose mouth was currently wide open, she smirked feeling pleased with herself and tuned to face Emily again, eyeing her mouth. She lent down and their mouths cashed together. Alison had never kissed Emily like this before she was completely dominating this kiss and her tongue was instantly on Emily's lips waiting for access, when Emily granted it she could feel Alison going deeper and she moved her hands to rub up and down Alison's thighs before moving to her back. Alison's hands had moved to Emily's ribs and brushed the side of her boobs which sent electrifying shocks through the brunette's body that caused her to moan into Alison's mouth. Emily's hands were now trailing through Ali's blonde hair pulling it slightly and in turn this caused Alison to moan that sent heat straight to her centre before quickly pulling away from Emily and standing up afraid that Emily would feel the heat. She turned and sat down leaving everyone else stunned, especially Emily.

"I fucking knew it!" Hanna screamed ecstatically


	10. First time

**A.N. okay so i know it has been forever since i uploaded a new chapter, i got serious case of writers block, but i think ive made up for it, im back with some Emison smut! chapter rated M.**

 **hope you enjoy!**

 **...**

The whole room was sat silently staring between Ali and Emily apart from Hanna who was harping on about how she had been right the whole time and that she knew Emison was a secret thing.

"for god sake Hanna shut up, this doesn't make you right, its makes us at a party drunk" Emily snipped at Hanna before standing up and storming out of the room, before she left she could hear Spencer shouting at Hanna for putting her foot in it as she always did but she couldn't stay to hear the rest of the conversation after that kiss she could barely speak, which she supposed was the dare but she felt so confused. She had never kissed Alison like that before it was so… Hot! She knew for sure that if they had been alone it would have definitely gone further and it kind of scared her but what confused her the most was the fact that Alison jumped up so quickly and then could not make eye contact. _'Surely the next step of any relationship is intimacy, Alison should know that so why did she look so scared and why can't she look at me?'_ Emily thought to herself as she made her way onto the balcony where it was much more calm and quiet. Sat outside in the cool night Emily realised how drunk she actually was and thought maybe she was over thinking the whole situation but then again maybe Alison had just come to realise that she could never be intimate with Emily and she did love her but just not like that. _'of course she didn't love me like that, she was confused how could anyone love me like that im just a whole load of baggage with some serious problems too much for anyone to deal with probably the whole reason why im a quickie these days and no more'_. "Arrrgh" Emily screamed she didn't know what else to do, she had been so happy these past few weeks and hated it when the darkness and sadness she used to feel took over.

Over the last few years Emily had harmed herself a few times, she knew it was wrong and that she shouldn't do it but when things got too much she just made a little cut and she at least felt something other than sadness even if it was pain. Right in this moment the thoughts of doing it again consumed her, wanting to get rid of what she was feeling so she grabbed her glass and threw it on the floor smashing it. She picked up one of the shards and put it to her thigh, pushing slicing until she saw blood. It was a strange feeling and she knew that her friends would think she was insane if they ever knew she did this but it was kind of like relief the only way she could describe it. Tears started rolling down her cheeks as she realised how truly fucked up she was and then she heard her, her beautiful blonde and her heart skipped a million beats.

"Emily fucking fields you put that down this instant. What are you doing?" Alison shouted as she walked onto the balcony and saw the smashed glass and the blood coming from Emily's thigh. In hind sight she thought she should have approached this with much more caution but she panicked at the scene unfolding in front of her and she felt sick at the thought that Emily wanted to do this. Emily just turned to her with tears in her eyes and then dropped her head not able to look at the blonde in the eye.

"Im sorry baby, I didn't mean to shout but please you can't hurt yourself, your too beautiful, too precious to be doing that tell me what's wrong" Alison said as she moved closer to the brunette and hugged her tight. "Ali, im sorry, I know you're going to hate me now and think im a serious nut job, I don't know it just happens, all these feelings they over take me, the darkness I hate it" Emily started but sobbed and could not finished her sentence, Alison just pulled her in and hugged her tighter.

"It's ok, I don't think anything other of you than you are my beautiful girlfriend. But Em, why are you sad, I have just claimed my stake on you, that kiss… wow, I thought you would be happy" Alison said feeling slightly confused herself.

"I was until I come to realise that your confused, you don't love me like that it's ok I can take It I know you could never be… intimate with me" Emily said wiping tears from her eyes.

"What are you talking about Em, I literally want to rip your clothes off every time I see you, of course I want to be intimate with you"

Emily turned her head as she was sure Alison was just saying it to save her feelings but she was also sure she could hear pure truth in her voice. "But you always stop it from going further and then that kiss it was so…" Emily couldn't find the words to continue. "Hot" Alison added with a hint of blush on her cheeks. "Yeah hot and you basically jumped a mile away from me and then couldn't look at me, reality obviously set in and you realised you could never do that with me" Emily said with sadness laced in her voice. Alison took a deep breath and sighed, she was looking at the love of her life so upset because of her again how can this be. "Emily you have to believe me, I love you, I love every part of you and I _want_ every part of you, I want our first time to be special I want it to be at the right time I don't want it to be rushed. I jumped up so quickly because you was making me…wet and I was almost ashamed I didn't want you to know because I thought you must have thought fucking hell who is this girl getting wet over a kiss how ridiculous, not because I don't want you" Alison blushed as she also dropped her head down.

Emily's head shot up at the sound of Alison's words. How can she get something so wrong, how she can be so stupid and now, now she just feels ashamed? "Oh" was all she could muster as she turned to face Alison who's cheeks where the colour crimson. They stared into each other's eyes for what felt like a life time before Ali moved forward and crashed her lips into Emily.

This kiss was slow, it was passionate and full of love, and Alison felt like she was trying to fix Emily with every movement of the kiss, she needed to prove once and for all that she loved Emily with every fibre of her being.

She deepened the kiss and begged Emily for entry to her mouth and as soon as the brunette did she stuck her tongue in exploring every inch of her mouth whilst completely dominating the kiss. Alison felt like she was on cloud 9 Emily was absolutely intoxicating and her taste her smell, everything about kissing her was like it was the first time all over again. The pair only split when the need for oxygen was too much.

"Wow" Emily said trying to catch her breath.

"Yeh…" Ali said as she grabbed the brunettes arm and pulled her up to come inside. Emily could see Alison's usually sparkly blue eyes where now dark with lust and she could guess where this was going, it made her insides do summersaults. When the girls where inside Emily's room their lips connected again and this time it was much more heated, fast and they were both fighting for dominance, Alison's hands where all over Emily's body and Emily's where guiding Alison over towards the bed. As Alison felt the backs of her knee's hit the bed she fell back with Emily on top of her. Moving further up the bed the girls positioned themselves so that Emily's leg rested between Alison's and pressed on her centre causing a moan to escape the blonde's lips.

Emily was now fiddling with the zip of Alison's dress trying to un-doing it, as she did she felt the bare skin of Ali's back and her breathing increased so much she thought she was going to pass out. Alison lifted her back so that Emily could lift the dress of and when she did the brunette sat up and just stared at her beautiful girlfriend who was now lay beneath her in only a black matching lace bra and panties. "Wow" Emily breathed heavily and she took in the sight, her abs were perfectly toned she skin had no imperfections and her boobs, they were perfectly round and the sight sent a pool of heat directly to her centre. "Now who's the ridiculous one just getting wet at the sight of her girlfriend" Emily said as she moved her lips to connect with Alison's neck. She bit hard, sucked and then ran her tongue over to sooth the sting. "Em…" Alison moaned at the feeling, Emily continued knowing she was leaving marks as she made her way to Ali's boobs, she unhooked her bra and threw it on the floor with her dress and she started straight away on her nipples, pinching and sucking at them in unison caused a louder than usual moan from Ali and she was so happy to be getting this reaction.

Before she knew it, in one swift move Ali had now flipped them over so she was on top of Emily. She moved her hands to the hem of Emily's skirt about to pull it up as Emily flinched and pulled in back down. Alison then remembers the events that had just happened and sadness flashed across her face. "Em, please promise me, if you ever feel the need to do that again, just tell me" Emily looked at the pure love on Alison's face and she let go of her skirt. As Alison lifted her skirt up the brunette was preparing to see the disgust in her face as she lay eyes on her scars, instead she lent down and lightly kissed each one, a tear forming in her eyes causing the brunette to let out a heavy breath not sure she could ever love this girl more. "Ali, please kiss me" Emily said and the blonde complied. Reaching for Emily's lips this time the brunette was the one dominating the kiss and it took Alison by surprise. Emily took this moment to again flip them over so she was on top before Ali could say anything Emily said. "Please just let me do this, let this be about you, I've experienced this before and you haven't I want to show you everything, I was to show you how much I love you" and with that Alison relaxed into Emily's body. Before this moment Alison was scared that she had never been with a woman before but all the fear was washed away as it was nothing to do with gender it was to do with the person she was with and that was Emily.

Alison was brought out of her thoughts when she again felt Emily's lips on her breast sucking her nipple which made her release a moan. Emily then starting moving her hand lower, drawing patterns on her torso, circling her belly button and Alison didn't think she could take any more. "Em pleas…" she breathed. "I could never resist you" Emily smirked as she moved her hand to cup Alison's centre. As her fingers made contact Emily thought she could cum off this feeling alone. "Ali baby, you wasn't lying when you said I made you wet" Emily said as she circled her wetness and covered her fingers, she started rubbing Alison's clit earning a loud moan from the blonde. At the same time she was sucking on Ali's neck and Alison thought she was going to combust right there, she needed release. "Em please…" was all Ali could get out. "What is it baby what do you want" Emily chuckled. "You, I want you" Alison said almost urgently. "What is it you want me to do" Emily again laughing she liked seeing how she had this effect on Alison. "I need…you…in me, now" Alison said getting very frustrated as teasing Emily was extremely hot and a massive turn on. "As you wish" Emily said as she slowly dipped one finger into the blonde. Alison held her breath at the feeling and Emily couldn't quite believe this was happening as she slowly moved in and out. Alison's hips raised as she tried to meet the brunette's hand. "Em, more please" Emily complied and added and second finger into the blonde. "Oh baby you're so tight" Em breath as the feeling of the blonde around her fingers was enough to make her cum. Emily started pumping in and out of Alison harder as she felt more confident. "Yes Em, that's it" Alison moaned and she was simultaneously moving her hips with Emily's hand. "Ali…" Emily moaned as the sight in front of her was orgasmic.

"Harder Em…" Emily was moving faster in and out of Alison and she had added a third finger thrusting into Alison as hard as she could. "Em… Em, im nearly there." Hearing Alison almost on the edge encourage Emily and she smirked and removed her fingers. Alison's head shot up from the pillow and sent daggers to Emily, "Emily please don't be a tease" Emily said almost desperation in her voice. "is _the_ Alison DiLaurentis begging". "Yes Em im begging now please" Alison said and before she could even finish Emily had entered her again with 2 fingers harder this time. The speed increased and she was now pumping in and out faster whilst rubbing the blonde's clit with her thumb. "Oh baby im guna cum, keep going harder".

Emily pushed one last time and curled her fingers hitting Alison's spot and the blonde tightened around her. "yes baby right there that's it" Alison shouted as Emily felt the liquid covering her fingers the blondes head shot back was back and she was convulsing as she hit her high. Emily slowed down the pace of her fingers letting Alison ride her high, until she came to a stop causing the blonde to moan. Both girls breathing was at an incredible pace as they both looked at each other, Alison had just had to most mind blowing orgasm and Emily was the one to give it to her.

"Em, that was, wow" Alison said as she tried to calm her breathing.

Emily just smiled at her girl her heart swelling no able to process the fact that she and Ali had just made love for the first time ever.

"Em I don't think I can do that for you, I don't know how" Alison said as she dropped her head. Emily grabbed her chin and brought her eyes to meet. "Baby, I think we worked up enough for the both of us, you can do whatever you want when you're ready, right now I want to cuddle my girlfriend and revel in the fact I just gave her the best orgasm of her life" Alison laughed and cuddled up to her girl, falling more in love with her by the second.


	11. The Morning After

**A.N. okay so this is only a teeny tiny chapter and i know i haven't updated in so long i totally just didn't know what to write. but i am working hard at the next chapter and hopefully that will be long and out soon!**

 **thank you to everyone that has left me a review i am so happy you are enjoy this.**

 **...**

Emily woke to the sun shining in through the balcony window, she could tell already it was going to be hot today and was excited about planning a day out with all the girls. As she moved her arms to stretch she was met by the naked back of a very beautiful but asleep blonde. For a second Emily almost forgot the events that had unfolded last night but the memories came flooding back, the game of truth or dare, kissing Ali like _that._ Making love with Ali. ' _Never in my life time will I forget last night'_ Emily thought to herself as she turned over to hug the blonde that occupied her bed. As she did her thigh had leaned against the sheets and it sent shooting pains right through her, she then remembered everything she didn't want to, sitting on the balcony, smashing the glass and taking it to her skin and Ali of all people catching her do it. She rubbed her temple as the effects of the alcohol were slowing introducing itself in the form of a cracking headache. Emily knew Ali was going to have more questions for her about why she hurt herself, she knew they were going to have to talk and Emily was going to have to confess about how fucked up she really was, but if anything was her mission it was going to be avoid that conversation at all costs.

Emily was broke from her thoughts as the blonde moved inside her hands and turned over to face her. "Good morning beautiful" Ali said in a sleepy tone that made Emily's heart melt. "Good morning baby, did you sleep well" Emily asked back planting a kiss on Ali's forehead. "I did thanks to you" Ali winked and moved her lips to Emily's. The kiss quickly turned passionate and Emily moved to be on top of the blonde, trailing her arms up and down Alison's naked body.

"Good morning Em, I thought I'd wake you first befo….. OH MY GOD, my eyes!" Hannah screamed as she burst into Emily's room without even a knock of the door. "HANNA! Jesus Christ, get out" Emily shouted back a blush creeping on her face. Ali just lay and laughed at the situation.

"Em, Ali I-I didn't think, I thought, what I mean is… wait a minute, are you both actually naked?!" Hanna started but couldn't really get her words out and then a smirk crept to her mouth as she realised the situation that was in front of her. Emily immediately pulled the covers over her body feeling incredibly embarrassed that her best friend had just walked in on her and Ali.

"Yes Hanna we are naked, wanna see" Ali laughed as she could see how much her girl was really hating this.

"Ali seriously" Emily shot a look to Ali and then turned back to Hanna. "Please can you just get out of my room" she pleaded.

"Oh Emily, don't worry im going, I can't wait to tell Aria and Spencer what I have just witnessed they are going to freak and then I am going to rub it in everyone's faces how I was right… again." Hanna laughed as she turned round to leave the room.

Just before leaving though she shot round and said "oh and I expect you two love bugs to be down stairs in 10 minutes looking more PG 13 with ALLL of the details of last night"

"Eughh" Emily screamed as she threw her head back on the pillow and pulled the covers completely over her face.

"Em, baby I think you was just in the middle of something" Alison said whilst trying to pull the covers away, she was smirking and was enjoying everything about this morning's events.

"Alison, you have got to be kidding me, was you not just here, Hanna was stood right there whilst I was on top of you naked and if we are not down stairs in a minute she will be right back here dragging our ass' down"

"Yes I was just here, in fact I loved the view" Ali said as she raised her eye brows. "But as you would much rather we be downstairs with our friends lets go" Ali stood up from the bed not bothering to conceal her naked body as she walked towards the bathroom. Emily's mouth just hung open as her eyes lay on the girl that owned her heart and she wondered when she got so lucky. "By the looks of it Em, you like the view too" Ali winked as she shut the bathroom door.

' _Alison DiLaurentis is going to be the death of me'_ Emily thought as sat up on the bed and for the first time caught a glimpse at her leg. it was raised and red and looked so ugly Emily almost burst into tears right there and then, when Alison seen it in the day light there was no way she was going to stick around, deep in thought Emily didn't hear Alison come out of the bathroom and stand in front of the brunette. "Earth to Emily" Alison said as she handed Emily a bathrobe, Emily shot up turning her body to hide the mark from the blonde.

"Emily Fields, don't you dare turn away from me" Alison said as she grabbed the brunettes arm and turned her around so they were facing each other.

"But…" Emily started but Alison interrupted. "Don't but me, I know you Emily don't forget that, I know what you're thinking and guess what your wrong, I think you are the most beautiful person I have ever set my eyes on, your funny, smart, strong minded, incredibly sexy and nothing you ever tell me is going to make me think differently, I love you Emily, all of you, even the darkest parts of you" Alison spoke with such honesty and Emily could feel the tears forming in her eyes. "and this…" also started and bent down to place her lips on the cut on Emily's thigh causing the brunettes eyes to close "..this is not going to make me run away, I am not happy about it by any means and we are going to talk about it whether you like it or not, but now is not the time because we have 3 girls waiting for us downstairs and im sure the longer we make them wait the bigger their smirks are going to be, oh and I have a certain blonde that needs some extra special Ali D scolding for being such a drunk ass last night" Alison finished causing Emily to let out a chuckle.

"I don't know if I have told you but I love you Alison, so much".

"Oh I think you may have mentioned it once or twice, come on" The blonde winked and pulled Emily towards the door.

"Oh and Ali"

"Yes Em?" the blonde questioned.

"Please go easy on Han, I know she deserves it, but we are kinda used to the new and improved Alison, Ali D hasn't reared her head in a while so your words might sting that little extra" Emily said cautiously.

"Oh Emily, Ali D got laid last night by the most amazing girl you could ever meet, how bad do you think her words could actually be" Alison winked and laughed as Emily's mouth hung open and they made their way downstairs.


	12. The teasing

**A.N. Okay so i actually did it, got a new chapter out, i kinda forgot how much i loved writing. i hope you enjoy this chapter, please leave me reviews!**

 **not sure where i'm really going with this so any prompts/ideas would be greatly appreciated. i know i focused loads of hanna and ali in this chapter but i love their friendship.**

 **anyways enjoy..**

Hanna, Aria and Spencer were giggling as Alison and Emily walked in to the living room.

"Good Morning, you two" Spencer said coyly whilst smirking.

"Morning Spenc" the girls replied.

Alison turned her head to look at Hanna who looked like she was going to spontaneously combust, she shot her trademark glare at the other blonde as a warning, this didn't really phase Hanna at all much to Ali's disgust. _'Oh my god I have lost my touch, Hanna is totally underestimating me, this should be fun'_

"Sooo…." Aria started cautiously before Hanna interrupted.

"Details, I want details and they better be juicy!" Hanna shrieked. This made Alison laugh and feel furious at the same time. "Let's just get one thing straight Hanna Marin, you have no right to talk about me and Emily, look at me and Emily and certainly not gossip about me and Emily. I have said it before and I'll say it again, Me and Emily.. IS BETWEEN ME AND EMILY! Got it?!" Alison screeched.

"But Ali…" Hanna interjected.

"No if's, no buts I know this time apart may have helped you forget but I, am Alison Dilaurentis and I answer to nobody, especially not you" Alison smirked that oh so familiar smirk that had grown men cowering and begging for mercy.

The 3 girls sat in silence a little shocked not really sure how they should approach this. Hanna felt like she was about to burst into tears, she thought her relationship with Alison had gone from strength to strength and they were at a point where they could tease each other, but right now Alison looked like she wanted to kill someone and one wrong word would send her on a war path.

The silence lasted for approximately 3 more seconds before Emily just burst into laughter.

"You should see you're faces right now, Hanna are you actually going to cry? Come on Ali I think that might be enough" Emily smirked and looked towards Alison who's facial expression had completely changed, it was now soft and a lot more like the Ali they were used to over the past few years.

"WHAT! You have got to be fucking kidding me" Spencer snipped angrily, she was just about ready to turn back into the 14 year old girl and fight Ali for being mean to her friends.

"Come on guys, admit it, I had you. You seriously thought I was that pissed" Alison chuckled and leaned her body into Emily's.

"Alison that is so not funny, I was just waiting for a Hefty Hanna remark and I would have been in tears" Hanna added before storming out of the room.

Emily turned and looked at Ali, giving her the look as if to say ' _i told you to go easy on them before'_ she looked around the room to see Spencer and Aria giving her a disappointed look and it kinda hurt, she was only joking with her friends but Hanna's reaction reminded her of how badly she had hurt them in the past and she hated it. Emily began to stand before Alison pulled her back down. "Don't, I'll go" Alison said and with that she followed Hanna outside.

 **x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x**

Hanna was curled up on the patio furniture with her legs tucked up into her head, Alison could have sworn she head sniffling so approached with even more caution. "Han…" she began, putting her arm onto her blonde friends back and sitting softly next to her. "Don't" Hanna spat as she looked up Ali and sure enough her eyes were red with tears. "Han, come on I was only joking, after you walked in on me and Emily like, well like that I knew I had all the teasing in the world to come and I just thought it get you at your own game, I really didn't mean to upset you this much, in fact I was kind of looking forward to the teasing, it makes me happy" Alison sighed. "It does?" Hanna more confused than ever with this whole morning. "Yeah it does, do you know how long I have waited to be with Emily for? If I am being teased it means it has finally happened. I love that you guys are the ones to tease me, we should always have been this kind of friends, the ones who talk about boys and girls, share our love stories, tease each other, laugh at each other without fear and im so sorry for being the way I was because I ruined all of that. I made you fear me not be friends with me" Alison lowered her head and she realised exactly the reason Hanna was upset.

"Ali, your right I did fear you, I was absolutely terrified of you, what you would think of what I wore, who I liked. But I also loved you so much, I wanted to be like you, I wanted to look like you, I wanted people to like me like you. It mattered to me what you think, it always has. You could make me feel like the worst person in the world but you could also make me feel like the best and it was, it is so special to be your friend. I see you now, I see how you have changed. You care about us, you love Emily so deeply that it makes my heart ache and I've seen that for years, im so happy you are finally embracing it, I just thought we we're at that place, to be the kind of friends that you're talking about but when you cut me off before, your tone of voice, your expression it just took me back to when I was 14 and you would put me down without a second thought, im sorry Ali for getting so upset, I know it's not like that anymore"

Alison put her arms around Hanna and squeezed so tight, she was so happy to hear these words from her friends mouth, it felt like a turning point, that the past is in the past and they were moving forward but those things needed to be said, Hanna needed to say them, for Ali already knew the truth. "Hanna Marin, don't ever apologise to me again, I am the one who will forever be sorry, for all that you just said and more that you could never imagine, your wrong though. You are the one who it is so special to be friends with, all of you, Spencer, Aria and Em. You made me and not the other way round and I love you all, I'm just so happy and forever grateful that I get a second chance at this to do it right" Ali smiled thinking about how everything could and should be so different.

"So we good?" Hanna asked wiping her remaining tears and sitting up straight.

"Yes Han, we're good"

"Thank god for that, I thought I was going to have to come out here to break up world war 3, but it's more like peace and love" Emily laughs as she steps through the patio doors followed by Spencer and Aria.

"We're all good, I hope everyone knows that" Aria added as she sat down opposite Hanna and Ali.

"My Girls, I love you forever" Spencer added smiling at the girls who would always be her family.

Emily lent down and kissed Ali on the lips before she could realise what she was doing, she shot back up so fast and a blush appeared on her cheeks.

"Em, I don't really know what your blushing for, I think we have all kind of figured it out that you and Ali kiss now, you were lay on top of her naked this morning" Hanna laughed before covering her mouth with her hand.

"What like actual naked? You never told us that part" Spencer said with a fake shock to her voice.

"Oh yeah like total naked…."

"Hanna I was not…"

"Emily, yes you was, want me to prove it, you have a love mark just about…" Hanna said slowly pointing towards Emily's body.

"Okay, okay Han, we get it, shut up" Emily quickly added turning almost beetroot colour in her face. Alison just laughed turning her head into Emily and placing a kiss on her shoulder.

"Babe, no need to be shy, that's not how I remember you last…"

"ALI! Seriously" Emily shouted.

All the girls burst out laughing at how red Emily had become if she was any redder she'd probably pass out.

"Okay so that answers my next question" Hanna again smirking and loving this conversation.

"And which question may that be Hanna" Ali challenged.

"Oh, no biggie just the one where I was going to ask had you and Em done it yet but I think I know the answer" Hanna said proudly and Emily nearly choked on her drink.

"Oh my god, you guys actually done it?! Was she any good Ali?" Spencer asked and Alison was almost speechless, that was never something she thought she'd hear out of the smart brunette's mouth, it was such a Hanna question.

"Go Spencer" Hanna cheered.

"Spencer, a lady never kisses and tells…" Alison starts but Hanna interrupts booing at the response. "…but I was never much of a lady, imagine your best time ever, multiply it and your still no closer to Emily" Ali smirks, mostly at Hanna's mouth hung to the floor, no one expected that reply from Ali especially her un-official official girlfriend.

Standing up the athletic brunette started walking inside. "Okay that is totally the end of that conversation, I am not participating anymore"

"Babe don't go" Alison shouted after Emily but it was no use she was already inside, with the biggest smile on her albite red face, she loved these girls.


End file.
